


we can touch utopia

by lo_ells



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/F, Fluff, Pining, a tutor au but make it lipsoul, its cute and soft, there's a lil bit of swearing but that's it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-01-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:48:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 29,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22180537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lo_ells/pseuds/lo_ells
Summary: Jungeun has had the biggest crush on the resident school badass, Jung Jinsol, for over two years, despite never having the courage to talk to her. However, when she gets assigned as Jinsol’s peer tutor, an opportunity presents itself. Will Jungeun take it?
Relationships: Jung Jinsol | Jinsoul & Kim Jungeun | Kim Lip, Jung Jinsol | Jinsoul/Kim Jungeun | Kim Lip
Comments: 56
Kudos: 483





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi so this is my first ever fic so PLS tell me if it is bad/good and leave comments! pls i beg
> 
> hope you enjoy!

Jungeun sighed as she looked up at the clock from her desk against the window, resisting a groan when it read 3:00. Still 30 minutes left until dismissal. The first 20 minutes had dragged by so slowly that she was convinced she’d aged a year since the arrival bell had rang.

It wasn’t that she didn’t enjoy the class, chemistry was her best subject after all, she was just buzzing for the first soccer practice of the season to start. It had been postponed the past two days due to the coach being ill, and Jungeun had missed the feeling of the wind against her face as she played.

But, she had to get through her class before any of that could happen. Snapping herself out of it, she tried her best to focus on whatever Ms. Ha had been lecturing all class. However, her eyes kept drifting to the back of a familiar head covered in jet black hair.

Jinsol.

Jungeun couldn’t help it, really, it was inevitable. Her eyes seemed to have minds of their own, and their favourite target happened to sit two rows forward and three seats to the right of her. Her first week of junior year hadn’t had many positives, what with soccer continually being cancelled and her new schedule kicking her ass already, but the one silver lining was that she shared a class with Jung Jinsol for the first time since freshman year.

Jungeun could recall the day vividly. Still bright eyed and bushy tailed, ecstatic to finally be starting high school, she walked into her second period chemistry class on the first day of school with a skip in her step. Barely through the door, however, the sight of the most beautiful girl she had ever seen had stopped her dead in her tracks. The girl was sitting casually at one of the high tables, gaze focused on something out the window, and Jungeun was floored.

Jungeun had known she was gay basically since she was in the womb, but every so often she’d see a girl and be reminded just how gay she really was. This was one of those girls.

Her blonde hair seemed to flawlessly flow down to her mid-back, straightened to perfection. Her brown eyes lost in thought as she watched their classmates outside. Her black outfit, ripped jeans and a leather jacket, looked as though it was designed specifically for her to wear. Her aura was captivating yet mysterious, and Jungeun instantly wanted to know everything about her.

There was a serious dilemma in her head at that moment. Does she sit next to the gorgeous girl and risk making a fool of herself right off the get-go, or does she play it safe and sit close enough that on a day that she was feeling more courageous, she could maybe start a conversation.

Before she had a chance to decide, the teacher came up from behind her and placed a hand on her shoulder.

“Hello! Welcome to chemistry! I’m Ms. Ha, and I’ll be your teacher for this year. What is your name so I can check you off the attendance?”

“J-Jungeun. Uh, Kim Jungeun,” Jungeun stammered out, eyes still flickering over to the mysterious girl by the window.

“Jungeun… Ah! There you are, perfect. It looks like I have you at seat 13, that’s at the back table there.” The teacher pointed to the same table that Jungeun had been not-so-subtly gaping at and her heart did a backflip.

“Here is your information package. Looking forward to a great year!” Ms. Ha concluded, with a 100 megawatt smile. Jungeun returned it as best she could, before she cautiously made her way towards her assigned table.

With every step, Jungeun became even more nervous. She had never thought of herself as a shy person or one to hesitate when making friends, but even from that moment Jungeun could tell that this girl was different. The vibe she gave off just sort of hit different, so to speak. She seemed much more composed and mature than one might expect a freshman, straight out of middle school and in the midst of puberty, to be.

After exhaling a deep breath and giving herself a quick pep talk, Jungeun sat down at the table, causing the girl to finally look her in the eyes. Any self-preparation went out the window when Jungeun met the gaze. It felt as though her brain had been turned to mush at seeing the beautiful face up close, and she was so mesmerized she didn’t catch a word the blonde had said to her.

“S- sorry, do you mind repeating that?” Jungeun sheepishly asked, trying to maintain eye contact.

“I’m Jinsol, looks like we are going to be lab partners this year. I hope you’re smart because I’m not so great at this kind of stuff,” Jinsol said as she gestured to the various beakers and test tubes on the lab bench they sat at.

Jungeun blinked, still adjusting to the way the light reflecting off of the girl’s eyes made them sparkle beautifully. Jinsol. It was suddenly the most beautiful name Jungeun had ever heard.

“Oh, yeah I’m alright.” Alright was an understatement. In the fifth grade, she successfully created her own table salt as a fun, after-school project. “I’m Jungeun, by the way.”

“Nice to meet you, it sounds like we’re going to get along just fine,” Jinsol smiled. Jungeun didn’t think her heart could take anymore, that smile almost killed her.

The teacher, Ms. Ha, loudly cleared her throat at the front of the room, and Jungeun was silently thankful for the interruption.

“Hello class! I hope you are all as excited as I am about this new school year! I know you are all freshman and may be a little scared of what is to come, but don’t worry, high school isn’t as bad as it seems.

“Unfortunately, it seems as though we have a couple of students who have transferred classes, so I’ll have to move your seatmates around. Hope you didn’t get too attached to each other!”

Jungeun’s eyes widened in panic. As much as the girl beside her made her more nervous than she had ever been, she’d take that over the possibility of not being her lab partner. Jinsol seemed like someone she wanted to get to know as much as she could.

“Let’s see… Taeyong has been left without a partner. Jinsol, can you move to his table please?”

Of course. Jungeun tried her best to hide her dismay as she heard a small groan beside her. She looked over at Jinsol, who didn’t seem to be too happy about moving either.

“Guess I’ll see you around, Jungeun,” Jinsol mumbled as she passed by. Hearing Jinsol say her name made Jungeun swoon a little, but that feeling was followed by disappointment as she watched Jinsol’s retreating figure sit beside some guy with weird hair.

After more shuffling around, everyone had new partners, Jungeun being stuck with some girl who wouldn’t stop talking named Yerim, and that was the first and only time Jungeun had talked to Jinsol throughout the following two years. Unless timid waves and cordial greetings when passing each other in the hallway counted, which Jungeun didn’t think did.

The dismissal bell interrupted Jungeun’s reminiscing, jolting her back to life in time to see Jinsol pack up her things and hastily exit the room. She always seemed as though she had somewhere else to be, and Jungeun has always been curious as to where that was.

Jungeun sighed again, wondering if she’d ever have a real excuse to get to know the girl she had been drooling over since that first day of high school.

Gathering her things, she followed her classmates out of the classroom and headed towards her locker.

“Aren’t you excited!”

Jungeun jumped a foot in the air as the cheerfulness of her best friend took her by surprise.

“Jeez Yerim I’m right beside you, no need to pierce my eardrums.”

Despite being disappointed she never got to be Jinsol’s lab partner, Yerim turned out not to be a terrible replacement. The two have been inseparable ever since they bonded over their shared excitement towards chemistry, Jungeun from an academic perspective and Yerim from the perspective of wanting to blow things up. It also helped that they were the only two freshmen at the time to make the varsity soccer team. They were definitely known around the school as a package deal.

“I know I’m sorry, I’m just so happy to be practicing again. And I’m so proud that you were named captain this year!” Yerim squealed in excitement, and Jungeun had to physically slow her down as they walked towards their shared locker.

“To answer your question, yes I’m excited, but also a little nervous. I still can’t believe I’m captain.” This was the first time in years that a junior had been made captain, so Jungeun was feeling the pressure a little bit. She knew she had a lot to live up to this year if she was to stay on course for her dream scholarship.

“Jungeun!”

Jungeun turned around to see her chemistry teacher Ms. Ha trailing behind them, trying to catch up to the girls.

“I meant to grab you after class but you are so speedy! I have to ask you something regarding our tutoring program.”

“Oh thank you, but I won’t need a tutor,” Jungeun said, curious as to why her teacher would think she would need extra help.

“Yes I know that silly, I’ve had the pleasure of giving you 100 on every assignment for the past two years. I was actually wondering if you’d like to be one of our tutors. You’d be assigned someone in your grade who is still struggling from last years concepts and who would benefit from getting extra help from one of their peers. What do you say?”

Ms. Ha gave Jungeun a pleading look, making it difficult for Jungeun to say no. She knew soccer was already a big commitment, but she also knew being a peer tutor would look great on her resume.

“Alright, I’ll do it.”

“Perfect! Thank you so much Jungeun, I’m sure it’ll be great. In fact, I already know who you’ll be paired with.”

“Oh yeah? Who is it?”

“Jung Jinsol.”

-

Jungeun was sitting in a more secluded corner of the library, her leg bouncing up and down at a mile a minute. She had arrived half an hour early to make sure everything was prepared for her first tutoring session with Jinsol, and to say the nerves were getting to her would be an understatement.

Jungeun didn’t think she had been this nervous for anything in her entire life. Even soccer tryouts couldn’t compare to the big ball of anxiety nestled in her stomach, making her feel like throwing up and passing out at the same time.

After Ms. Ha had informed Jungeun that she’d be tutoring the girl who was constantly on her mind, she almost retracted her acceptance on the spot. But the more rational part of her brain told her that it wouldn’t be a big deal, and that it didn’t matter who she was tutoring, the benefits were still the same.

Plus, it was only Jinsol. Jungeun could keep herself together for an hour and a half, right?

So, she reluctantly allowed Ms. Ha to schedule their first session, not knowing it would be the very next day. Jungeun had at least expected she’d have a couple days to mentally prepare, but she wasn’t even afforded that, with the excuse being that the two girls’ schedules only lined up on that day.

How Ms. Ha knew Jungeun’s soccer schedule, Jungeun wasn’t sure, but didn’t question it too much since she was more focused on the fact that she had less than 24 hours to gear herself up for her first tutoring session with her crush.

Jungeun had bought new sets of flashcards, pens, highlighters, and anything else she could think of that might come in handy. She even almost stopped to get snacks for the two of them before realizing that might have been a bit much. She’d laid out everything they would need on the large table in front of her, and all she had to do was wait for Jinsol to show up.

Their session was supposed to start at 4:00. It was 4:10 and Jungeun was starting to get a little concerned. She wished she had asked Ms. Ha for Jinsol’s phone number or email address or something, but she would never have had the guts to do that.

As the clock approached 4:30, Jungeun looked towards the entrance to the library one final time, and resigned to the conclusion that Jinsol wasn’t going to show up. Yes, she was nervous, but this was her one chance to actually talk to Jinsol in two years, and now Jungeun was sure that fate was not on her side with this one.

Right as she began packing up, a commotion near the entrance caused Jungeun to look up.

Stumbling in, knocking over a couple of stacks of books along the way, was Jinsol.

Her hair was completely windswept, her backpack half slung over one shoulder, and by the time she reached Jungeun’s table, she was completely out of breath. Jungeun couldn’t believe her eyes.

“I am so sorry I’m late, I had an appointment right before this that ran super late and I basically sprinted the whole way back to school,” Jinsol managed to get out, taking a couple of breaks to breath.

Jungeun laughed, finding the state the girl was in completely endearing.

“Its fine, you aren’t that late.” Half an hour late was pretty late, but Jungeun was just happy she showed up altogether.

“Well that isn’t true but I appreciate it. I hope we can still get some stuff done today? I seriously need the help.” Jinsol slumped into the chair across from Jungeun, taking out her notebook and pencil case. Both were black, as was her outfit, as usual. Jungeun guessed that must be her favourite colour.

It was only when Jinsol looked back up at Jungeun that Jungeun realized the situation she was in. Sitting directly across from Jinsol. Alone. Just the two of them. For another hour. Talking about chemistry. That little exchange was the longest conversation they’d had since they met.

“Y-yeah, why don’t we start with what you find the most confusing and go from there?” Jungeun had never tutored anyone before so, as smart as she was, she was worried she wouldn’t be very good at it. The fact that her first student was Jinsol only added to the pressure she was feeling.

“Is it bad if I say I think everything is confusing?” Jinsol replied shyly, finally looking away from Jungeun and instead focusing on her hands in her lap.

“No! No, of course not, I’m sorry,” Jungeun hastily apologized. Great start. “Let’s just start from the beginning then.”

The next hour went by fairly uneventfully. Jungeun slowly started to get the hang of explaining the concepts in a way in which Jinsol understood, but it turned out to be more difficult than expected. It wasn’t that Jinsol was dumb, honestly it was quite the opposite, but it seemed to be that her mind was always elsewhere. Jungeun had to remind her to stay focused more than she would have liked to, but once Jinsol was focused, she understood things pretty well.

Jungeun surprised herself at how well she managed to keep herself together. The only dead giveaway that she was freaking out internally was her leg violently shaking under the table. Her voice only cracked once and she only caught herself admiring Jinsol for longer than socially acceptable, like, four times. Considering the situation, Jungeun was proud of herself.

The two worked tirelessly until the alarm on Jungeun’s phone indicated their time was up.

“God, I think my brain is about to explode.” Jinsol relaxed into her chair and cracked her neck, an action that Jungeun found more attractive than she probably should have.

“You did good today. I hope I helped you at least a little bit.” Jungeun isn’t sure how much Jinsol is going to retain from today’s session, or if she’ll even want another one, but she hoped she at least made things a little easier for the girl. Even based only on the past hour, Jungeun could tell that Jinsol was a lot smarter than she was letting on, and Jungeun was curious as to why her grades didn’t reflect that.

“Are you kidding? You explain things way better than Ms. Ha does. Don’t tell her I said that though.” Jinsol winks at Jungeun, causing a blush to flare up on her cheeks. “Please tell me you’re willing to have more sessions because if you help me I really think I can do well this year.”

Jungeun couldn’t believe her luck. Jinsol wanted to spend more time with her? Yes in an academic setting but she’d take anything at that point.

“Oh, yeah of course! Maybe we can meet every week at this time? And maybe next time you won’t be late...” Jungeun smiled at the offended look on Jinsol’s face that gradually turned into a smile of her own.

“Alright Miss Jungeun, I see how it is. How about I give you my number just in case? Wouldn’t want to leave you sitting here all alone again.”

Jungeun’s eyes widened and her brain short-circuited for a solid two seconds. Had Jinsol seriously just asked for her number?

The look on Jinsol’s face was hard to decipher, but something about the way their eyes met and the intensity of Jinsol’s gaze, despite the playfulness of the exchange, made Jungeun equal amounts of excited and terrified.

Without saying anything, because she knew if she tried it probably wouldn’t make any sense, Jungeun ripped a piece of paper from her notebook and started to copy her number down despite her shaking hand.

“Hey do you remember in freshman year when we were lab partners for like, 2 minutes?”

Jungeun stopped writing, frozen in place.

Of course she remembered, she’d relayed that moment in her mind more times than she could count. What was really shocking was that Jinsol remembered it. She’d never mentioned it before now, but then again any interaction between the two in the past couple years was a casual smile or a “hey” when passing each other in the hallways.

Jungeun looked up and met Jinsol’s gaze. There’s that look again.

“U-um, yeah I think I do. That was on the first day, right?”

“Yeah, it was. It’s too bad it didn’t stick though. I would have much rather stayed with you, you seem cool.”

Jungeun had to physically stop her jaw from dropping in surprise.

“And apparently I’m not the only one who thinks so. You know you are kind of the talk of the school these days, what with you becoming captain of the soccer team. To think I could have had an in with The Kim Jungeun.” Jinsol smirked as Jungeun blushed even more than earlier, which she didn’t think was possible.

“I wouldn’t go that far… Just Jungeun is fine.”

Jinsol picked up the piece of paper, folding it into her pocket before gathering up her notebooks and pencils.

“Alright Just Jungeun, I guess I’ll see you later.” Flashing another of what Jungeun labelled her signature smiles, Jinsol gave her a final salute before turning around and leaving the library.

Once her dark hair was out of sight, Jungeun let out a much needed breath, and started to wonder if any of that had actually happened.

One thing she knew for sure, though, was that she had just given Jung Jinsol her phone number.

-

Jungeun had practically been glued to her phone for the week after her first tutoring session with Jinsol. She knew that there wasn’t really a reason for Jinsol to text her, but the fact that Jinsol had her number and wasn’t doing anything with it was causing Jungeun to spiral.

Had she just asked for it to be nice? Or was it really just to let Jungeun know if she was going to be late again? Maybe to ask for notes if she missed a class? She was guilty of that sometimes, and Jungeun always felt a bit gloomy when she’d notice that Jinsol’s desk was empty.

Jungeun hoped there was an ulterior motive behind the request, that Jinsol just wanted to talk to her, but as the days wore on, Jungeun found that to be unlikely.

On the bright side, soccer had been going very well so far. The team managed to finally string a few practices together, and they had just won their first game of the season the day before.

Jungeun was buzzing. During her first game as captain she managed to score the winning goal in the last 5 minutes. The elation she felt as her teammates all crowded around her, smiles wide and patting her on the back, combined with the sound of the crowd roaring nearby was a feeling she wasn’t sure she’d ever get used to.

Jungeun also had been noticing that she seemed to be developing a bit of a status. Jinsol evidently hadn’t been lying when she said Jungeun was the talk of the school.

Jungeun wasn’t quite sure how it happened, but she was popular.

It wasn’t that she was unpopular before, but as of late it seemed everyone’s eyes were on her as she made her way from class to class. Her classmates belonging to the so-called upper class started to give her the time of day, and most of them were nice, but they were all so fake Jungeun was sure she could see right through them.

She wasn’t quite sure she was enjoying her newfound spotlight.

The day before her next tutoring session with Jinsol, not that she was counting or anything, Jungeun was walking down the hallway, minding her own business, when a boy she had never talked to before made a beeline straight towards her.

“Hi Jungeun. I’m Mingyu, not sure if you know who I am but I’m the football team captain.”

That made Jungeun recognize him. Mingyu was probably the most popular boy at her school. Everywhere she went, she’d overheard conversations about how attractive he was, how well he had played at football the other night, and whether or not he had hooked up with some girl Jungeun didn’t know.

So the fact that he even came up to talk to her threw Jungeun through a loop.

“Oh. Hi, what’s up?”

“Well I’ve kind of always thought you were really pretty but I’ve been too shy to say anything. For some reason I was feeling a bit courageous today, and I was wondering if you wanted to go to the movies with me this weekend?”

Jungeun had to physically stop herself from laughing out loud right in front of the poor boy.

To be fair, nobody outside of her family and friends knew how much of a big fat lesbian she was, but she wasn’t sure if she was ready for the whole school to know just yet.

“That’s really sweet, but I’m honestly trying to focus on my schoolwork and soccer this year. I’m sorry!”

Jungeun hoped that sounded sincere enough, she really was still trying to hold in a laugh. She also wasn’t entirely sure if he was telling the truth or not. It seemed a bit suspicious that he only now came up to her, given her newfound status.

“Oh. Yeah, no that’s cool.” Mingyu loudly cleared his throat. “I mean, you still seem pretty cool, and now that your kind of popular I figured I’d give it a shot. No worries though, I’m sure I’ll see you around sometime.”

And with that, he was gone, and finally Jungeun let out a little chuckle. Men.

Pretending that whole ordeal never happened, Jungeun made her way to the cafeteria and towards her usual table, rolling her eyes when she spotted Chaewon and Hyunjin bickering again.

“Listen, it’s not my fault that you’re terrible at Mario Kart. What do you want me to do, let you win?” Chaewon asked, clearly annoyed at Hyunjin’s antics.

Hyunjin looked at Chaewon like she was wearing a Halloween costume on Christmas morning.

“Uh, yeah? That’s exactly what I want, you beat me literally every time. God, do you even have a heart?” Hyunjin slammed her phone down onto the table in exasperation and looked around at her friends for some kind of support against Chaewon’s seemingly ludicrous behaviour.

Jungeun sat down in her spot beside Yerim, silently asking her if what the two idiots were arguing about was anything serious. Yerim shook her head.

“Its some stupid online racing game. Chaewon keeps beating Hyunjin and we all know how much Hyunjin likes to lose.”

Jungeun nodded, knowing exactly how much after a particularly nasty session of Monopoly a couple months back.

Just as Jungeun started to dig into her lunch, she felt her phone vibrate in her back pocket. As she pulled it out and read the message, her eyes widened and her phone clattered to the table.

Chaewon and Hyunjin finally stopped arguing and turned to look at Jungeun, who looked like she’d seen a ghost.

“Hello? Jungeun? What happened?” Yerim asked curiously.

Wordlessly, Jungeun slid her phone across the table to Chaewon, who gave her a weird look but opened the phone tentatively. Once she had read the message, her face morphed to mirror Jungeun’s.

_hey, is this jungeun? it’s jinsol. jung jinsol, the one you are tutoring. not sure if you know of any others haha_

“UM JUNGEUN WHAT THE HELL?”

Even for the cafeteria, that was a bit loud, and a couple of heads turned to give Chaewon a dirty look, but the girl was unfazed, eyes locked on Jungeun.

“Why the HELL didn’t you tell us that Jung Jinsol had your number?”

The other two at the table gasped in surprise and scrambled to read the text message off of Jungeun’s phone. They immediately followed Chaewon’s example and turned to glare at Jungeun, who still looked like she was ready to pass out.

“You gave her your number? I mean I knew you were going to be her tutor, I still can’t believe you managed that, but you never told me you gave her your number! Why not? I’m surprised you didn’t spam the group chat immediately!” Yerim couldn’t believe her best friend had kept something like this from her.

All three of them had known about Jungeun’s crush on Jinsol for a while, it only being a matter of time before Jungeun couldn’t keep her gay thoughts to herself.

They all became friends early in freshman year, Jungeun and Yerim adopting Chaewon after someone had tripped her during their grade’s five mile run. Instead of being hurt, though, Chaewon was livid since she was on track for a top ten finish, and immediately caught up with whoever had tripped her.

It was Hyunjin, which was unsurprising once they got to know her. Jungeun had to physically hold Chaewon back from punching Hyunjin in the face, but once Hyunjin questioned if she wanted a step stool so the blonde could reach her face, Chaewon stopped resisting and instead commended the other girl for her the diss. Needless to say, a mutual respect was born.

The two ended up joining the track team together, making up half of the relay team that went all the way to nationals the following season. But neither of them let the other forget about that first meeting, constantly trying to one up each other in basically everything.

Weirdly enough, it was a bonding experience for the four of them, and they’ve been inseparable ever since, which made the whole idea of Jungeun keeping something this big from them even more bizarre.

If she was being honest, Jungeun didn’t want them to get their hopes up. They’d lived through enough of Jungeun’s incessant rants about how pretty Jinsol’s eyes were or how gorgeous her smile was. They’d barely survived when Jinsol dyed her hair from blonde to black in sophmore year, Jungeun almost having an aneurysm when she saw Jinsol in the hallway.

Despite that, they encouraged her at every corner and were always willing to listen, and Jungeun couldn’t thank them enough for it. That’s why she knew if she had told them about how the tutoring session had ended, they would have been over the moon and planting false ideas in her head about her and Jinsol riding off into the sunset.

As much as Jungeun wanted to believe that was a possibility, she couldn’t.

The two of them had gone to the same school for two years now. If Jinsol was interested in her, or even interested in girls, wouldn’t she have said anything? Tried to keep in touch? They still had the same class together for the rest of that year, so the opportunity would have been there.

Jungeun had resigned herself to the fact that this crush was destined to be one-sided, and she accepted that a long time ago. The last thing she needed was her friends hyping her up only to be disappointed when nothing ever happened.

With a sigh, Jungeun finally met the gaze of her friends.

“I don’t know… I guess I just forgot about it?” That was a lame excuse, and they all knew it.

“Bullshit you forgot about it, this is Jinsol we are talking about here. When did this happen?” Hyunjin was about to enter interrogation mode.

“Um… like a week ago?”

Chaewon jumped out her seat.

“A WEEK AGO? ARE YOU INSANE?”

“Park Chaewon! Please keep your voice down!” Ms. Kim skipped over to their table, a wide grin on her face, as usual, despite the scolding words. “Everyone knows your meal won’t be as fulfilling if you are surrounded by loud noises!”

Jungeun blinked. Where on Earth did she hear that?

“Right. Sorry Ms. Kim, I’ll keep it down.” The look on Chaewon’s face as she sat down showed more restraint than Jungeun had ever seen. She had already been kicked out of the cafeteria 5 times so far this term, and it had barely been two weeks.

At the sight of Ms. Kim retreating, Jungeun instantly felt all three pairs of eyes back on her, and sighed.

“Okay fine. I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want it to be a big deal. I’m just tutoring her, nothing else.”

Hyunjin frowned. “Well it will be nothing else with that attitude. C’mon, its been how long since you’ve been fawning over her? Now is the perfect opportunity to make a move.”

Yerim and Chaewon nodded in agreement.

Jungeun sighed again. “Guys it isn’t that simple. We don’t even know if she likes girls, let alone if she’d li-”

“If you say something self-deprecating I will not hesitate to smack you across your beautiful face,” Chaewon threatened, even going as far as to ready her palm.

One look at the girl and Jungeun could tell she was serious, suspension be damned.

“Alright well before any of that happens, Jungeun, you haven’t even replied yet! I wonder why she’s texting you.” Yerim grabbed Jungeun’s phone and handed it back to her.

“You read the text, she probably just wants to make sure she has the right number or something.”

Jungeun fiddled with her phone for a moment, her shaking hands causing her minor difficulty.

_hey! yes, this is jungeun!_

Yerim looked over her shoulder as Jungeun pressed send.

“That’s it? Come on, put yourself out there! Try and start a conversation!”

“Relax Yerim, it was just the first-”

Jungeun was interrupted yet again by the sound of her phone buzzing on the table, causing all four of them to jump in their seats.

_good good. i wanted to make sure we were still on for another session tomorrow? same place and time? well, the same time as it was supposed to be at_

Jungeun smiled, remembering how adorable Jinsol looked when she was all flustered and out of breath.

_yes of course! that time was 4:00 by the way, you seemed to have forgotten_

“Oh my god Jungeun is that flirting? A little banter? Who is she?”

Jungeun pushed Chaewon so hard she almost fell off the seat.

_jeez a girl is late ONE time and never hears the end of it. but that sounds good, i’m looking forward to it :)_

Looking forward to it? Why? It was just a tutoring session? Was Jinsol that excited about learning? And the smiley face?

Jungeun decided against replying, still trying to process that she really had texted Jinsol and she wasn’t just living in some fever dream.

“Jungeun has a daaate, Jungeun has a daaate.” Jungeun’s three idiot friends started to sing quietly at their table, causing her to laugh and shake her head.

Definitely not a date, Jungeun knew that, but that didn’t stop her from cautiously letting her friend’s optimism spread to her too. Maybe the hope wasn’t entirely false.

-

The nerves had slightly subsided in Jungeun’s stomach as she made her way to the library. She could confidently say she wasn’t as nervous as she was before their last session, the nerves instead replaced with anticipation and excitement. The whole “caution” idea had kind of been disregarded at that point, with Jungeun’s hopes being higher than they ever had before.

Jungeun stopped walking and took a much needed death breath.

Nothing had really changed, despite her newfound optimism. She still didn’t know if Jinsol liked girls, if she liked Jungeun, or if she even wanted to be Jungeun’s friend. Jinsol seemed like she had much more important things to worry about than Jungeun and her stupid crush.

Jungeun knew if she had vocalized those thoughts, Chaewon would have heard, from wherever she was since the girl had a sixth sense when it came to Jungeun and her self-deprecation, and follow through on her threat of smacking Jungeun.

But Jungeun couldn’t help it, her pessimistic nature keeping her from getting too overwhelmed by the possible outcomes. At least, not until there actually was something to get overwhelmed over.

For now, she was just tutoring a pretty girl, and she desperately tried to leave it at that.

But, a girl could dream.

Picking up her pace, Jungeun entered the library at 3:50, making her way to the same table as last week. However, when that table came into view, she froze on the spot.

At least Jinsol definitely wouldn’t be late.

The girl was sitting patiently at the table, her supplies already laid out in front of her, and her foot slightly tapping on the floor. Jungeun physically felt the hopes she had pushed down spring right back up again at the sight.

As Jungeun got closer, she heard Jinsol’s faint humming, recognizing the melody from a Red Velvet song released a little while ago. Interesting.

Jungeun cautiously placed a hand on Jinsol’s shoulder once she was close enough, making Jinsol leap about a foot in the air in surprise.

“What are yo- Oh! Hi Jungeun!” The apprehensive look on Jinsol’s face was immediately replaced with a beaming smile upon her recognition of the younger girl.

“Hey, what are you doing here so early? We don’t start for 10 minutes.” Jungeun sat down at the seat across from Jinsol, smiling when she noticed Jinsol had animal crackers spewn haphazardly across her notes.

“Well I really didn’t want to be late this time, I felt bad enough without you teasing me about it. Also, I brought you some animal crackers in case you were hungry, they’re my favourite.”

Jungeun blushed as Jinsol slid over a package of animal crackers, happily accepting them.

“Thank you, I definitely didn’t bring a big enough lunch today.”

“Well that’s silly. I always have extra food so if your hungry, find me or text me or something. I’m always willing to share.”

The offer was so genuine, and coupled with the concern displayed on Jinsol’s face, Jungeun literally swooned.

“O-ok, yeah, I’d like that. Thank you.” Jungeun shyly focused her attention on her notebooks as she removed them from her backpack. “Should we get started?”

The session went by as well as the last one had, with Jungeun feeling as though Jinsol was making great progress already. However, with around 20 minutes remaining, they were interrupted.

Mingyu had suddenly appeared in front of them, he always seemed to come out of nowhere, and sat in the empty seat next to Jungeun, much to Jungeun’s surprise. She thought when he had said he’d see her around he meant like in the hallways or at a sports event, not the very next day in the library after school hours.

“Hey Jungeun. How’s it going?” Completely ignoring Jinsol’s presence, Mingyu’s eyes were firmly on Jungeun, making her feel a bit uncomfortable.

“I’m good? I’m just in the middle of a tutoring session with Jinsol, is there something you need?”

“Yeah actually. I need you to come to my party this weekend.”

The bluntness of his question, more like statement, made Jinsol choke on an animal cracker. Still, Mingyu’s gaze didn’t waiver.

“Um… why?” Jungeun had never been to a high school party, and she was fairly confident she didn’t want her first one to be at Mingyu’s house.

“Because everyone is going. Well, everyone who matters anyways, and that’s you now, remember? So, are you coming or not?”

Jungeun was going through some serious mental gymnastics. She didn’t want to go, she knew that. She honestly couldn’t think of something she’d less rather do than go to this guy’s house who she’s only talked to twice, be without any of her friends, and be forced to socialize with the “upper class” of her high school.

Despite her strange feeling of obligation to say yes, she decided against letting her newfound status influence her decision.

“Aw man, that’s terrible timing. My parents are taking me out of town this weekend to visit my grandparents. I hope it’s a good party though!” The lie was surprisingly easy to tell, and Jungeun was proud of herself that her voice didn’t crack and she didn’t stutter.

“Jeez, you seem like a fun time,” Mingyu muttered under his breath, but it evidently wasn’t as quiet as he had hoped.

“Hey, you don’t even know her asshat.”

Jungeun’s eyes widened as Jinsol spoke up for the first time during this little exchange, the words causing her heart to flutter a little.

Mingyu rolled his eyes.

“Whatever. One of these days you’ll come around, everyone usually does.” With that, and a sad attempt at a wink, he was gone.

Jungeun sighed.

“Sorry about that. He asked me out yesterday and I guess he didn’t take my rejection very well.”

Jinsol’s eyes widened.

“He asked you out? I’m surprised you said no. As much of a sleazebag as he is, most girls wouldn’t dare turn him down.”

Jungeun swallowed sharply.

“Well, he isn’t exactly my type…”

At that, Jinsol arched an eyebrow.

“Oh yeah? What is your type then Miss Jungeun?”

There it was. The Look.

Jungeun wasn’t sure if Jinsol was doing this on purpose, or if she had any idea how flirty this exchange had turned. Maybe it wasn’t flirty and she was reading too far into it, but that look. Jungeun swore there was something behind the way Jinsol looked at her.

That look caused Jungeun to muster up just the right amount of courage to say what was lingering on the tip of her tongue.

“Well, for starters, definitely a girl.”

A beat passed. Then another.

It took approximately ten seconds for the stunned look on Jinsol’s face to morph into one of acceptance, with a hint of something Jungeun couldn’t quite label, immediately easing the worries Jungeun had started to form with each passing second.

“Oh! Well that makes sense as to why you’d turn Mingyu down then. Immune to his idiotic charms, that sounds like a gift.”

Jungeun smiled, staring into Jinsol’s deep brown eyes.

“Yeah, I guess it comes with its perks.”

Jinsol looked away, suddenly finding the paling blue of the wall behind Jungeun very interesting, before clearing her throat.

“Yeah, um, we should get back to what we were doing before we were rudely interrupted.”

And so they did. They finished the tutoring session without any more hiccups, ending with Jinsol stating that she was confident she would ace their first test coming up the following week.

As Jungeun was packing up her things, Jinsol spoke again from across the table.

“Hey, I’ve been craving ice cream all day. Do you want to go get some? I know a great place not far from here.”

The casualness in Jinsol’s proposition did nothing to quell the panic that overtook Jungeun’s brain. She could barely handle being around Jinsol in an academic setting so Jungeun knew anything more was a recipe for disaster.

Get ice cream? Is she joking? First of all, it was late September, borderline too cold to even think about ice cream. Let alone the fact that they’d be basically hanging out for the first time outside of school.

But really, was she ever going to say no to Jinsol?

“Um, yeah sure! I’d love to.”

Jungeun hoped for that tiny bit of courage from earlier to flare up again soon, or else she might not make it through this outing in one piece.

Jinsol grinned in response, immediately walking towards the exit, bouncing up and down as she walked making Jungeun question if her cereal had been spiked that morning. It took serious effort on Jungeun’s part just to keep up with her.

“Great! They have, like, a million flavours and I have yet to try one that is bad so you are in for a treat!”

Jungeun shook her head, amazed at how slowly Jinsol was revealing her inner weirdo, and even more amazed at how adorable she found it. It was quite amusing that Jinsol had a relatively mysterious and outcast image around school, but the minute you exchange a few sentences with her she’d expose her undeniable charms.

“Well you better hope I don’t choose the only one that sucks or else I’ll forever hold you accountable.”

-

“What’s your favourite animal?”

Jungeun wasted no time in providing an answer. “An owl.”

Jinsol rolled her eyes.

“Why am I not surprised. The nerd loves owls. Real original there Jungeun.”

Jinsol barely managed to escape the slap, sliding along the booth so she was just out of Jungeun’s reach.

“No but seriously, why an owl? What, do you stay up super late and digest food into pellets?”

It was Jungeun’s turn to roll her eyes at that stupid comment.

“Yeah that’s why. All those bones and pelts I eat are just too much for my stomach.”

Jinsol laughed, causing the few customers in the shop to look her way. Man her laugh was loud and obnoxious, but man did Jungeun love to hear it.

“Okay, honestly, they are so majestic and are just the picture of peacefulness. Like, nothing ever really rattles them? They are so calm and collected, and kind of exist without giving a shit about anybody else. Plus, I’ve always wanted to be able to turn my head all the way around.”

Jinsol smiled at that. “Yeah that makes sense. It suits you, actually.”

“You saying I don’t give a shit about anybody?”

Jinsol’s eyes widened.

“What? No! No you are super nice and a great tutor and fun to hang around with, I’m sor-”

Jungeun laughed, a couple decibels lower than Jinsol’s, but effective enough to interrupt Jinsol mid-apology.

“I’m kidding, but I appreciate the compliments.”

They’d been at the ice cream parlour for a little over an hour. Jungeun was surprised at how easily the conversation flowed between them, as she allowed her more confident and socially-adept side take over. Every so often, Jinsol would make a comment that Jungeun still couldn’t help but blush or shyly giggle at, but she was starting to get more accustomed to Jinsol’s presence.

They were in the middle of exchanging questions, mainly about dumb, trivial things, but Jungeun enjoyed getting to know Jinsol better nonetheless.

“You know you are so much meaner than I expected Miss Kim Jungeun. You better watch out or I’ll spread so many rumors about you being a bitch you’ll never want to step foot in our school again. Not that anyone would believe them but, you know, it’s the thought that counts.”

Jungeun didn’t think Jinsol meant to strike a nerve, but that particular topic had been at the forefront of Jungeun’s mind since the beginning of the school year.

“Honestly go for it, I’m not entirely sure I would mind going back to just being Jungeun who is good at soccer and chemistry.”

Jungeun couldn’t help the sudden change in atmosphere that statement caused, but she had been keeping her feelings down for a little while, and something about Jinsol made her feel as though Jungeun could tell her anything.

People had started to look at Jungeun differently, treat her differently, expect different things from her, and she didn’t like it. As much as she enjoyed the feeling on the soccer field, off of it was a totally different story.

Jungeun suddenly felt her hand being clasped from across the table, and she looked up to meet Jinsol’s caring eyes.

“You can talk to me about it, if you want. Or we can drop it, up to you. But I can only imagine how different this year has started off for you.”

At Jinsol being so considerate, Jungeun almost poured her heart out right in the middle of that ice cream shop. However, she somehow managed to resist the initial word vomit, instead taking her time to really think about her inner turmoil. She knew it wasn’t a huge deal, and she didn’t want it to come across that way, but insecurities were insecurities.

“Honestly, I don’t really know how to feel. I guess it was kind of epitomized back when Mingyu asked me to his dumb party. Like, I knew I didn’t want to go, and I don’t regret lying to him, but even the fact that I considered going despite all the reasons not to kind of scared me, I guess.

“I don’t want to change, I like who I am, for the most part. I’m scared that I’ll become totally influenced by the throws of high school popularity that I’ll forget what really matters. I know it sounds dumb but-”

Jinsol shook her head feverently, interrupting Jungeun before she started to minimize her worries. Chaewon would like her.

“It doesn’t sound dumb, really. But the fact you are even thinking about this shows that you aren’t going to change anytime soon. As long as you know how amazing you are, especially compared to all those asshats in our grade, I don’t think you have much to worry about.”

Jungeun really tried not to cry at the sincerity in Jinsol’s words. They barely knew each other and yet somehow Jinsol knew exactly what to say.

Jinsol smiled suddenly. “Wait, you lied to Mingyu? I thought you really did have to go out of town. Damn Jungeun, you’re a terrifyingly good liar.”

Jinsol’s attempt at lightening the atmosphere worked, causing Jungeun to roll her eyes, a common occurrence when she was with Jinsol, and shake her head.

“Seriously though, it takes some real stubbornness to not succumb to society’s expectations about typical high schoolers and prioritize what you really want. You’ve already done it once, and I have no doubt you’ll do it again. I’m sure you’ll stay true to yourself despite whatever, you know, fame and fortune comes your way.”

Jungeun snorted. “You sound like one of those, like, mentors or advisors from a Disney movie who gives the main character a lesson on self-identity and not conforming to the wills of the masses or something stupid like that.”

Jinsol laughed again, another seemingly common occurrence. Was Jungeun really that funny?

“Hey, you’re the one who started sharing her feelings, I’m just here to provide support. And if that’s in the form of Disney characters than you’re just going to have to live with that.”

Jungeun smiled. She could definitely live with that.

“Ok, enough about me. You never told me your favourite animal!”

Jinsol seemed surprised at Jungeun’s sudden change of topic, but must have assumed the younger girl was done talking about her insecurities for now. That didn’t mean she retracted her hand, though.

Jungeun had been too caught up in her own inner chaos to even realize Jinsol had started holding her hand. Holding. Her. Hand.

Jungeun immediately felt her face go beet red and prayed it wasn’t too obvious in the poorly lit ice cream shop.

“Oh that’s easy. A blue betta fish.”

Jungeun raised her eyebrows. “That’s oddly specific. Any particular reason?”

Jinsol broke their easily maintained eye contact, and the contact of their hands, and turned to stare at something out the window while her hands instead tightly gripped her napkin.

“Well, they’re fighters, highly adaptable, and often spend lots of time alone. They kind of rely on themselves to survive and not anyone else. I really think they’re incredible…”

The way in which Jinsol trailed off that sentence, and the melancholic look on her face as she stared out the window, hinted to Jungeun that there was certainly a deeper meaning than just a favourite fish. Jinsol had just helped Jungeun with a few of her insecurities, maybe she could do the same?

“They sound incredible. It seems like you identify with them, at least a little bit, right?”

Jungeun was sure to be hesitant, not pressuring Jinsol too much for an answer. And she almost took back her words immediately when she recognized a sense of panic overtake Jinsol’s face. But Jinsol met Jungeun’s eyes, and with Jungeun trying to convey as much empathy and support as she could, Jinsol sighed.

“Yeah I guess you could say that.”

That wasn’t it, Jungeun could tell. So she waited patiently for Jinsol to bring herself to say what was really on her mind.

“I lied to you that first day, you know. I wasn’t late to our session because I had an appointment.”

Jungeun couldn’t hide her surprise. “Oh? What were you doing then?”

“Well usually I have a free last period, so I tried to squeeze in a job interview before our session, but it ended up going longer than I had hoped, and I honestly needed the job more than the tutoring at that point.”

Jungeun frowned at the sad smile Jinsol shot her way.

“I really felt bad about being late, but I had been laid off from my previous job a little while before and that was the first time I’d heard back from anywhere I’d applied to. It’s only a barista job but it’s all I could really get. And at least I did get it, thankfully.”

“Why do you have to work so much?” Jungeun wasn’t sure she wanted to know the answer, but knew she had to ask the question regardless.

Jinsol looked down at her lap, closing her eyes tightly.

“My dad, um, he left my mom and I when I was a baby. I barely remember him, luckily. I don’t want to. But my mom has had to work multiple jobs just to keep us afloat ever since. Honestly I don’t really see her very often, our schedules don’t really line up.”

Jungeun’s heart broke. She couldn’t imagine a life without either of her parents, or one in which she didn’t have a good relationship with them.

“Oh Jinsol, I’m so sorry.”

Jinsol shook her head, waving off any apology Jungeun could muster.

“It’s not your fault, that’s just life. You have to play the cards you’ve been dealt. So the minute I became old enough to work, I got my first job at this very ice cream shop actually, between freshman and sophomore years.”

Jungeun looked around at the store they were still sat in. She noticed how quaint it was when they arrived, definitely more of a hole in the wall than a bustling chain. There weren’t many customers, they’d been there almost an hour and a half and she could probably count the number of people who entered on one hand.

“This seems like a nice place for a first job, why did they lay you off?” Jungeun hoped she wasn’t prying too much, but every detail Jinsol revealed made her want to know more.

“As you can probably tell, this place doesn’t get a huge amount of business. They couldn’t handle the extra staff, and I understood that. The couple who run it are lovely people, and I still owe them a lot. That’s why I am still a loyal customer, despite it all.”

Junguen watched as Jinsol glanced around the store with a genuine smile, making eye contact with the worker behind the register, smile widening when he shot her a wave. Jungeun felt her chest expand with pure admiration and fondness for the girl sat across from her.

“I think you are one of the strongest, most driven and hardest-working people I’ve ever met, and I’ve known you for a week.”

The unexpected compliment drew Jinsol’s attention back to Jungeun, and Jungeun recognized the increasingly familiar look on Jinsol’s face, but this time there was a new warmth in Jinsol’s eyes that Jungeun instantly decided she wanted to see more of.

“I mean, technically we’ve known each other for two years, but still. Thank you, Jungeun.”

Jungeun hadn’t been wrong when she had thought of Jinsol as a mystery. But she was a mystery Jungeun really wanted to solve.

“By the way, you definitely weren’t lying. This ice cream slaps.”

“I told you so!”


	2. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i realize this is full of cliches but i honestly can't bring myself to care so i hope none of you do either :)

It had been about two months since the ice cream “date,” and Jungeun was on her way to her favourite class with a spring in her step.

Jungeun would like to think that her and Jinsol were, at the very least, friends. They constantly texted, had hung out after every tutoring session, and Jungeun had even visited Jinsol at work once or twice. The excuse was that she wanted to drop off some extra homework, but they both saw through that lie fairly quick.

Jinsol had also started to come to every soccer game to support Jungeun. She had made a custom sign with some corny saying with Jungeun’s name and number, much to Jungeun’s public annoyance, and private glee. Whenever Jungeun saw Jinsol cheering like a maniac in the stands, she had that extra incentive to play like her life depended on it. And it seemed to be working, as her team were well on their way to the championships.

However, they still didn’t sit together in chemistry. For all of Ms. Ha’s good qualities, her strict seating pattern wasn’t one of them. It took a written note from a doctor to even have her consider moving a student closer to the board due to their poor eyesight.

So, Jungeun was still resigned to staring at the back of Jinsol’s head during class, with the only difference being that Jinsol would sometimes turn to meet her gaze, causing Jungeun to immediately look anywhere else and hope the blush on her cheeks wasn’t too obvious.

The text she would often receive afterwards, something along the lines of _you should take a picture if you’re gonna stare that much!_ didn’t make the butterflies in her stomach go away any faster.

Despite that, Jungeun was glad she had made friends with Jinsol. Yes, her hopeless crush had developed into even more intensely hopeless feelings, but she decided having Jinsol in her life was better than not, even if it was purely in a platonic fashion for the foreseeable future.

Jinsol’s seemingly god-given gift of flirting didn’t make it any easier, but Jungeun slowly became a little desensitized to it. That didn’t mean Jinsol wasn’t capable of turning Jungeun into a blubbering mess at any time of day, but still. It was an improvement.

Jungeun’s friends were unfortunately as hopeful as ever. Whenever Jungeun would retell a conversation between her and Jinsol, flirty elements and all, Yerim would start smiling uncontrollably, Hyunjin would start jumping up and down in joy, and Chaewon would start screaming. Every time. No matter where they were. Once, they almost got kicked out of a Dairy Queen because the guttural scream that Chaewon let out when Jungeun informed the group of her and Jinsol’s first hug had caused several people to call 9-1-1.

And finally, Jungeun had begun to let her more irrational brain control her thinking. Yes, she knew it was clear to anyone within a three foot radius that she was pining for her new friend. But, the more time they spent together, the more Jungeun started to think her feelings might not be too one-sided.

The way Jinsol would always text her at lunch asking if she had enough food, even if Jinsol wasn’t at school.

The way Jinsol would insist on paying every time they went to get ice cream or coffee, despite Jungeun’s adamant protests.

The way Jinsol would hug Jungeun just a bit longer than would be considered a platonic.

Jungeun needed a second opinion to confirm her suspicions however. Or, more like a second, third, and fourth opinion. She’d been down this road before, assuming every pretty girl’s behaviour was significant before being let down upon the confirmation she was straight, and she didn’t want to look like a fool again.

This time it seemed different though, and Jungeun knew her friends would be honest with her if they thought there was something reciprocal between her and Jinsol, despite their incessant optimism. They didn’t want to see her hurt anymore than she wanted to get hurt, and they knew finding out Jinsol was straight sooner rather than later would save her from future heartache.

Jungeun just needed an opportunity to get them all in the same place. Her birthday wasn’t coming up, and neither were any of her friends. Also no holidays or anything, not that anyone would throw a party on Thanksgiving.

Jungeun texted Yerim as she approached the classroom, asking her to brainstorm any ideas on how to get Jinsol and their friend group together. Yerim had always been the avid party planner, and responded with such enthusiasm that Jungeun could sense the beaming smile on her face through the twenty emojis she had sent.

As she headed to her usual desk, Jungeun walked by Jinsol, who had her nose buried in a textbook. She gave Jinsol’s side a poke, causing the black haired girl to jolt as if she’d been shocked. Once she realized what had happened, Jinsol turned around to shoot Jungeun an accusatory glare, with Jungeun already sat laughing in her seat.

“Hey! What was that for?” Jinsol whisper yelled across the room. Class hadn’t started, but everyone knew how much Ms. Ha loved a silent classroom.

Jungeun just shrugged, her laugh deepening when she saw the pout that appeared on Jinsol’s lips.

“That won’t work on me, I’m immune to it by now with how much you use it. Not as effective as you’d think.”

Wrong. It took every ounce of self-control and determination she possessed for Jungeun to learn to not give in to Jinsol’s pout. That thing was deadly.

Jinsol huffed and turned around just as Ms. Ha entered the room, as elegant as ever in her plaid sweater vest and long, flowy skirt.

“Hello class! Hope everyone is having a great day today. I don’t really feel like going over any new material today, and since we are already ahead, I’m not going to!”

Jungeun really loved Ms. Ha. She was sometimes a bit scary, she’d been written up a couple of times for trying to terrify a few students into submission if they tried to give her attitude, but she meant well. Usually.

Mainly it just didn’t seem like she cared. She cared about the students and their success, and she genuinely enjoyed teaching, but the “system,” as she so eloquently put it, was what she despised.

She knew better than anyone that the school system wasn’t designed for everyone, and that there were bound to be smart kids who didn’t succeed purely because they didn’t fit the mould. That’s why she always took the extra time to make sure her students knew they had her support, and that’s why she set up the peer tutoring system in the first place.

Plus, she was a big softie for a certain red-haired teacher, so the tough act was really just that. An act.

“Instead, I’m going to assign a project. Well, kind of a project. It really shouldn’t take you longer than this class time, but it’ll be due tomorrow at the beginning of class. Oh, and it must be done in pairs.”

The class groaned. Ms. Ha always randomized pair assignment. She insisted it would help develop friendships and a sense of community, but it usually meant unequal workloads and arguments.

“And before you all start moaning, I’m feeling nice today, so I’ll let you pick your own partners.”

Before Ms. Ha had even finished her sentence, Jungeun saw Jinsol’s head whip around in the corner of her eye.

“You better be my partner.” Jungeun barely deciphered Jinsol’s mouthed sentence, and Jungeun responded by crinkling up her nose in faux-disgust.

Jinsol’s jaw dropped right as Ms. Ha announced their work period had begun, and she stormed over to Jungeun’s desk.

“Even though I’m mad at you since all you’ve done is be mean to me since you walked in you’re insane if you think I’m letting anyone else be your partner.”

That was another thing Jungeun had learned about Jinsol. She was extremely dramatic, and nothing pleased Jungeun more than teasing her into oblivion.

“Ugh, fine. I guess I’m stuck with you then,” Jungeun groaned, but her smile betrayed her. She’d never been more happy to be stuck with anyone.

“You’re damn right you are.” And Jungeun was glad Jinsol returned the sentiment.

Ms. Ha handed out their project information. As Jungeun skimmed the page, Jinsol began poking her arm with various colours of pen. Once Jungeun concluded they could easily finish the assignment in half an hour, Jinsol had drawn a picture on her arm.

“Look! It’s us! An owl and a blue betta fish!”

Jungeun looked down at her own arm and almost melted at the sight. Jinsol was no artist, by any means. If Jinsol hadn’t identified her drawing Jungeun wasn’t sure she would have been able to decipher it, but it was an owl and a betta fish surrounded by hearts. On her arm.

When Jungeun looked back up at Jinsol, the famous look that Jungeun had grown all too familiar with was etched on Jinsol’s face. Jungeun could probably describe the look from memory at that point, and she had started to uncover some of the hidden emotions behind it.

One, for sure, was adoration.

“I love it. Maybe I’ll get it as a real tattoo.”

Jinsol’s eyes widened. “Um, maybe get a real artist to draw it and then we’ll see.”

Jungeun laughed, and they both turned their attention to their assignment, where it remained for about five minutes.

The two were immediately distracted when Ms. Kim entered their classroom unannounced, trying as best she could to not raise suspicion. She ended up kicking a student’s desk and almost knocking down an entire bookshelf before she made it to Ms. Ha’s desk.

Jungeun had watched the whole encounter, trying to keep in a laugh for the red haired teacher’s sake, and elbowed Jinsol when she noticed the girl turning her focus back to their assignment.

“Hey, leave that for a minute. This is going to be way more interesting, trust me.”

Jinsol looked confused. “Why? What’s so interesting about Ms. Ha and Ms. Kim talking?”

Before Jungeun could give her an answer, Ms. Kim finally addressed Ms. Ha.

“Hello Sooy- I mean Ms. Ha.” A wink. “How are you doing this fine morning?” Another wink. “I was thinking about heading to the teacher’s lounge, fancy a banana?” Another wink.

“Stop it Jiwoo, you look like you’re having a stroke.”

Jungeun snorted.

“Ok fine, I was just trying to keep up appearances, you’re the one who told me to keep things professional in regard to our… you know.” Yet another wink.

“Yes I know what I said but if this is your idea of professional I’m starting to think the whole school will know by the end of the week.”

Jinsol nudged Jungeun. “Know what? Why are they whispering?”

Jungeun rolled her eyes.

“Because they’re dating, dummy. I think it’s still fairly new, but they’ve been flirting for, like, the past year. There were only so many times Ms. Kim could make the excuse that she was just visiting to check the air quality.”

Jinsol seemed to freeze, and Jungeun could tell she hadn’t been paying attention to the latter half of what Jungeun had just said.

“Hello? Earth to Jinsol?”

Jungeun lightly slapped Jinsol’s cheek, finally bringing the girl back to reality.

“Sorry, sorry, just spaced out for a second. Let’s keep watching.”

Jungeun gave her a strange look and decided she’d deal with that later, turning her attention back to the scene between her two favourite teachers.

“Baby…”

Ms. Ha’s eyes widened and her cheeks instantly turned tomato red.

“You can’t call me that here, are you insane? I told you only once a day and definitely not at work!”

Ms. Kim’s pout deepened, sliding an extra chair closer to Ms. Ha’s desk and began not so subtly running her hand up and down Ms. Ha’s thigh.

“Not my fault you look so cute today.”

It looked like it was taking incredible restraint from Ms. Ha to avoid either kissing or punching Ms. Kim, Jungeun honestly couldn’t tell which.

“I cannot believe you are doing this right now. You know you are hitting every one of my weak points and I am very angry about it.”

Ms. Kim smirked.

“Not every one yet.”

On that cue, Ms. Kim reached over and nibbled on Ms. Ha’s earlobe.

Jungeun’s jaw dropped and she heard a loud gasp from Jinsol next to her. With a quick glance around the classroom, she saw the rest of her classmates completely focused on their work, so they were startled when Ms. Ha abruptly stood up, knocking over a few things on her desk in order to steady herself.

“Class I will be gone for approximately 15 minutes. Please don’t break anything.”

Her voice cracked on every second word, and she clumsily made her way out of the room as fast as she could, not even giving Ms. Kim a second glance, but the redhead kept her eyes trained on the teacher’s retreating figure.

“Hmm, might be closer to 10.”

With a wink, Ms. Kim skipped out of the room as well.

Jungeun and Jinsol could barely believe what they had just witnessed, while their peers seemed largely unbothered and went back to their work, albeit a bit more noisily than before.

“Are they…” Jinsol trailed off, seeming to not want to hear the answer.

“Going to fuck? Definitely, did you see the way Ms. Ha stood up? That ear nibble must have really done a number on her.” Jungeun shuddered. “Gross, at school too.”

Jinsol seemed to be having an existential crisis beside her. Jungeun had no idea why, it was just two of their teachers acting like horny teenagers, but she decided it was more important to get Jinsol back on track.

Jungeun gently poked the other girl’s cheek, smiling when their eyes met and Jinsol’s panic seemed to retreat.

“C’mon, let’s just forget about them and keep working on this assignment. I really want to get it done before we leave.”

Jinsol just nodded, and was unusually quiet until Ms. Ha came back. It was, as predicted, closer to 10 minutes. Her skirt looked like it was on backwards and her hair looked like a rats nest, but her good mood seemed to have increased. Jungeun shuddered again at the thought.

Right before the dismissal bell, Ms. Ha reminded the class that their due date was the next day.

“Shit, we barely got halfway through. This took longer than I thought it would,” Jungeun groaned.

Jinsol frowned in response. “Yeah, what should we do?”

An idea popped into Jungeun’s head. Their tutoring session had been cancelled for the week since Jinsol had been scheduled to work last minute and she couldn’t get out of it.

Jungeun was devastated that their weekly hangout had been scrapped, but an opportunity had presented itself and Jungeun didn’t want it to slip away.

“Well, you could come over and we could finish it together? I don’t live that far, if that’s ok with you, of course.”

Jinsol’s eyes lit up. Jungeun loved when they did that.

“Oh, yeah that’s cool with me. I haven’t been to your house yet, I’m excited to see it.”

Jungeun’s eyes widened as she was instantly hit with a wave of regret. Oh right. Her house.

It wasn’t that her house wasn’t nice. Really, it was quite the opposite. Both of her parents were lawyers, and good ones at that. They had personally designed their entire house, it was their life’s work.

Jungeun was nervous Jinsol would think badly of her. She knew of the girl’s humble upbringings, and wasn’t sure her stance on wealth. The last thing Jungeun wanted was Jinsol to think of her as some snobby rich girl.

Before she could retract her offer or provide an alternative, the bell rang. Some of Jungeun’s worries went away at the excited look on Jinsol’s face, already asking her questions about her home and if her parents were nice.

They made their way out of the classroom, Jungeun leading Jinsol through the school on her usual path to the exit. However, Jungeun’s arm was violently gripped and she was pulled to the side by the entrance to the library before they made it outside.

“Jungeun! You were just going to leave without saying goodbye? I thought we were friends!”

It was Hyunjin. Jungeun should really have recognized the grip of the younger girl.

“Sorry! I forgot to text you guys, I was just heading home with Jinsol.”

Jinsol was awkwardly standing behind Jungeun, slightly alarmed at the way Jungeun was dragged out of the crowd.

Yerim popped into Jungeun’s view at the mention of Jinsol.

“What? Jinsol is here?” Her eyes widened when they met the shy girl’s. “Oh my god hi! Jungeun has told us so much about you!”

Jungeun glared at Yerim, thankfully out of Jinsol’s sight, and mouthed to shut up.

“I’m Yerim! It is so nice to meet you.”

Jinsol gave a cautious smile, shaking Yerim’s outstretched hand.

“Nice to meet you too. Didn’t we have chemistry together freshman year though? I swear you were the one who blew up a test tube, causing the fire alarm to go off and everyone to evacuate the building in the middle of December.”

Yerim laughed. “Ha! Yeah that was me! I’m such a pyromaniac sometimes but hey, it’s all part of my charm.”

Jinsol looked a little scared and glanced to Jungeun for assurance. Jungeun nodded her head fondly. Yerim was harmless, despite her ever growing love for explosives. Jungeun thought the girl had a real future in pyrotechnics.

“Well I’m Hyunjin. Great to meet you.”

Hyunjin brought Jinsol in for a hug, which she clearly wasn’t expecting. Hyunjin was a hugger, however, and wouldn’t let go until Jinsol awkwardly returned the embrace.

A blonde head appeared from behind Hyunjin, looking suspicious. As Hyunjin turned around to close her locker, her back was revealed to have the phrase I AM AN IDIOT spelled out in sticky notes. Jungeun smacked Chaewon, who was trying to hold in her laughter, before trying to remove as many notes as she could before Hyunjin could notice. She didn’t want Jinsol to be exposed to her friend’s psychotic tendencies that early.

Chaewon finally turned in Jinsol’s direction, eyes widening in recognition, the prank on Hyunjin completely forgotten.

“Oh! Um, hey. I’m Chaewon, really nice to meet you. I’m not going to lie, I’m still salty you dyed your hair back to black. We were the only two blondes in the school before then.”

“Yeah I did like the blonde for a while. Eventually my scalp started crying and I had to listen to it,” Jinsol grinned, also trying to keep in a laugh at the obscene prank.

Chaewon nodded. “Fair. I mean, my scalp is as strong as a Mexican wrestler so I’m gonna be blonde until I die. At least the black looks good on you too.”

Jinsol blushed at the compliment, looking away and down the hallway before suddenly starting to frantically wave at someone she recognized.

“What is she doing?” Hyunjin muttered to Jungeun, both staring at Jinsol’s wild attempts to get someone’s attention. Jungeun barely managed to get all of the sticky notes off in time, Hyunjin giving her a weird look when she noticed the stack in the brunette’s hand.

“I have no clue. Maybe some sort of dance?”

Finally, whoever Jinsol was waving down appeared at her side. A short brunette who looked like she could be in a commercial flicked Jinsol on the nose, causing her to flinch.

“I saw you way down the hall, why did you keep waving your arms like a maniac.”

“I just wanted to make sure! Also, I wanted to tell you that I’m going home with Jungeun today.”

Jinsol turned her attention back to Jungeun, and the other girl followed suit.

“So you must be Jungeun. I have to thank you for motivating this idiot to actually start doing well in school again. I kept trying but she’s too damn stubborn. You’re a miracle worker.”

Jungeun blushed. She wouldn’t call herself a miracle worker, but her ego appreciated the boost.

“Well she’s a great student. And you are?”

“Heejin. The unfortunate soul stuck being Jinsol’s best friend.”

Junguen laughed as she shook Heejin’s hand, Jinsol hitting the girl on the shoulder.

“Hey! I’m a great friend. You’re just mean.”

Junguen’s heart warmed at the exchange. Jinsol hadn’t really mentioned any other friends, but Jungeun was glad she had other people to lean on. She definitely needed it.

“These are my friends Chaewon, Yerim, and Hyunjin.”

Heejin smiled at all of them, but her eyes lingered particularly long on Hyunjin.

“Nice to meet you all.”

Suddenly, Yerim started jumping up and down. Jungeun had come to know that that meant she’d had an idea.

“Oh! Oh! I have the greatest idea! We should all hang out this weekend! Since Jinsol and Jungeun have become friends, it’s the perfect opportunity for us all to get to know each other!”

Yerim stole a glance at Jungeun and shot a mischievous grin in her direction.

Of course. Jungeun had asked her to think of a way for the group of them to hang out. Man, Jungeun really loved Yerim.

“That’d be fun! How about bowling? I haven’t been in ages.” Jinsol looked excited, smiling widely at Jungeun and her friends.

“Yeah, bowling would be great.” Hyunjin piped up from beside Junguen, but her eyes had not left Heejin’s. It looked like they were involved in some sort of staring contest.

“How about Saturday?” Chaewon suggested.

“Sounds good to me, let me know the details and I’ll be there. See you guys later.” With one final smirk Hyunjin’s way, Heejin was gone. Jungeun heard the audible sigh of relief from Hyunjin. Strange.

“Well we should get going too. I’ll see you guys tomorrow!”

Jungeun grabbed Jinsol’s hand and finally led her outside the school and towards her car. Her stomach started churning at the reminder that Jinsol would be seeing her house, but every time Jinsol’s thumb rubbed against her hand, she started to feel just a little bit better.

She hoped she could at least hang on to Jinsol until Saturday.

-

As it turned out, Jungeun had nothing to worry about.

Not that it should have been a surprise, but Jinsol didn’t seem to care in the slightest about Jungeun’s family’s evident wealth. If anything, Jinsol admired it.

As Jungeun drove the two back to her house, Jungeun had indulged Jinsol’s numerous and detailed questions about her home life. What seemed normal to Jungeun, like luxury vacations multiple times a year and a brand new car when she turned sixteen, was completely foreign to Jinsol, and Jungeun couldn’t contain her relief when Jinsol didn’t hold that against the younger girl.

Jungeun received a flick on the nose, safely at a red light, when she admitted those worries to the dark haired girl. Jungeun really should have known better. At that point, Jinsol didn’t seem like she was going anywhere.

After the initial shock upon entering Jungeun’s family’s estate, and the immediate demand for an extensive tour, Jinsol had reluctantly agreed to start working on their assignment. As Jungeun expected, it was finished in less than 20 minutes.

Jungeun felt stupid inviting Jinsol over. It took them no time at all and they easily could have finished it at the library or their usual coffee shop, but Jungeun’s desire to be around Jinsol clouded her better judgment, and not for the first time.

The more time they spent together, the more Jungeun could feel herself falling deeper and deeper. Her thoughts were more consumed with Jinsol than they ever had been, which Jungeun didn’t think was possible.

Jungeun loved everything about Jinsol. Her little scar in between her eyebrows. The way her tongue poked out between her teeth when she was concentrating. The smirk she’d send Jungeun’s way when she made Jungeun blush. The giggle that always followed one of Jungeun’s dumb jokes.

Her feelings were becoming a bit too much for her to handle, and her mind was constantly in conflict between her rational and irrational sides. With the hope every sign of reciprocation brought, her insecurities and worries were there to send it away.

Jungeun needed some resolution. And soon.

Her spiraling thoughts and desperate attempts at coming up with a reason for Jinsol to stay were interrupted by the girl suggesting they watch a movie to celebrate their mighty accomplishment.

Jungeun breathed a sigh of relief, happily leading Jinsol towards their home theater.

Maybe Jinsol didn’t want to leave so soon either.

Midway through Moana and the large bag of animal crackers bought in case this situation arose, Jinsol hesitantly grabbed the remote to pause the movie and turned towards Jungeun.

Immediately, Jungeun’s full attention was on Jinsol, the confusion and inner turmoil clear as day on the girl’s face.

“Can I ask you something? If it is too personal you don’t have to answer.”

Jungeun scoffed. “Honestly you know more about any of my insecurities than my friends do. I think we crossed the “too personal” line a while ago.”

That got a little smile from Jinsol. Small victories.

“Okay…”

Jinsol paused. She really seemed to be contemplating her next move, and whether or not she wanted to follow through with this supposed questioning.

“When did you realize you were gay?”

Jinsol had said it so quietly and so quickly that Jungeun was almost sure she hadn’t heard it right.

Whatever she was expecting to be asked, it wasn’t that. However, the topic had obviously been plaguing at Jinsol, and luckily, Jungeun’s answer wasn’t hesitant in the slightest.

“Well to be honest, I’ve always known. My mom still never lets me live down the time I came home from the first day of kindergarten with the declaration that I had fallen in love with five different girls in my class.”

Jungeun smiled fondly at the memory. Her parents’ love and acceptance never failed to warm her heart.

“I know I’ve had it easier than most in that respect, I never questioned my sexuality or anything like that and my parents have done nothing but support me. It has really just been something I’ve always known and I’ve never thought of myself as anything else.”

That answer didn’t seem to help Jinsol in the slightest. If anything, it only caused her furrowed brow to deepen.

“Oh, I see. Yeah, I guess you did have it easier than most.”

Jungeun wasn’t sure what was going on in Jinsol’s beautiful head, but this exchange caused the cogs in Jungeun’s brain to turn.

Jinsol’s reaction to Ms. Ha and Ms. Kim earlier that day.

Jinsol’s reaction when Jungeun herself had come out to her.

Maybe Jungeun wasn’t so far-fetched in thinking Jinsol’s actions weren’t solely platonic.

It all seemed to be piecing together for Jungeun, which made it even more devastating that it didn’t seem like it was for Jinsol. Nonetheless, Jungeun would be there for Jinsol through the whole experience.

Jungeun’s optimistic side was begging for her intuition to be true, because if it was, that would mean the girl of her dreams might not be restricted to just her dreams. Jinsol just had to realize it first.

“Is there any particular reason you’re asking?” Jungeun tried to gently probe more information out of the older girl.

Jinsol finally met Jungeun’s caring gaze. Of course. The Look.

“I’m not sure. I’ll have to get back to you on that.”

With that, Jinsol turned away and pressed play on the remote, attention returning to the movie.

Jungeun stared at Jinsol’s side profile. The crinkle in her forehead was still present, their talk doing nothing to help.

Jungeun reached over and interlocked their hands, squeezing gently in reassurance, before resting her head on Jinsol’s shoulder. She felt Jinsol’s head turn to look down at her, but chose not to meet the gaze, and smiled at the small thank you Jinsol whispered to her

After a moment, Jungeun felt Jinsol settle her head atop the younger girl’s, where it remained for the rest of the movie.

Jungeun hoped, for Jinsol’s sake as well as her own, that that realization came sooner rather than later.

-

“This is going to be soooooo fun!”

Jungeun cringed at the volume of her best friend as she bounded down her front porch towards Jungeun’s car. Even with the car stereo pounding and the windows rolled up, Jungeun could hear Yerim’s squeals before she’d stepped foot outside her house.

Yerim opened the door to the back seat and gave Jungeun and Chaewon, who was sitting in the passenger seat, awkward back hugs before finally sitting down and buckling up. Jungeun made sure the girl wasn’t hanging out the door, a habit learned from experience, and heading towards Hyunjin’s house.

“I’m so excited to see Jungeun gay panic over everything Jinsol does.” Chaewon turned to Jungeun with a smirk. “Jinsol could hit a gutterball and you’d say ‘Ugh that’s so hot.’”

Jungeun slapped Chaewon repeatedly, almost swerving the car into a nearby pedestrian, with the blonde cackling like a maniac.

“I would not! Plus, these days I don’t even gay panic anymore, it’s Jinsol who gay panics.” Jungeun half-heartedly tried to plead her innocence, but she knew it was no use. The blonde was a firm believer that the only one that could poke fun at her friends was herself, and she was never one to hold back.

“Yeah right. I’ll believe that when I see it. I don’t know if that girl has an embarrassing bone in her body. She seems like the type to walk around with some middle-aged white guy acting as her own personal backpack carrier and on-call footrest just because she can.”

Jungeun snorted. If only Chaewon knew how much of a dork Jinsol actually was.

Jungeun smiled when she realized she was probably one of the only people to have seen past Jinsol’s mysterious aura. There were so many different sides to that girl, and Jungeun was so glad she was slowly uncovering all of them.

As Jungeun pulled up to Hyunjin’s house, she was reminded of their last encounter with Jinsol and her friend Heejin.

“Hey, did anyone else notice Hyunjin and Heejin’s little staring contest when we were all introduced? It looked like they were about to jump each other, but I’m not entirely sure in what context.”

Chaewon shuddered. “Ew, I do not want to think of Hyunjin like that. She’s like my brother.”

“Brother? She is a girl?” Yerim looked bewildered.

“Oh sweet child. We are brothers of arms.” Chaewon sent Hyunjin a weird salute when she noticed the taller girl walking down her driveway, which Hyunjin immediately returned.

“I will never understand your friendship.” Yerim sighed, but grinned excitedly at Hyunjin when she entered the car.

“Hey loser, looking great as usual. Quick question. Is there anything happening between you and Heejin? Jungeun thinks y’all fucked.”

Hyunjin looked like a deer in headlights at Chaewon’s bluntness, eyes darting between her three friends. She’d barely been in the car for five seconds.

“Um- what? Who’s Heejin? You’re fucking her! I’m straight?”

Jungeun rolled her eyes. “Right. And I don’t alphabetize my cereal.”

Chaewon momentarily turned her attention back to Jungeun. “I don’t know if that was supposed to be sarcasm, but it did not have the desired effect. Remind me to teach you later.”

“We all know who Heejin is. Is there something going on between you two?” Yerim asked gently.

Hyunjin just stared blankly in response, either not understanding the question or too reluctant to answer.

Jungeun smirked at the state of her friend, finding it all too familiar.

“Man, I love it when I’m not the one being interrogated about their love life. Finally I’m on the other side.”

“Oh don’t worry, we’ll get to you later. But you being gay over Jinsol isn’t news. C’mon Hyunjin, spill! I thought we were bros!”

Hyunjin’s eyes pleaded with Chaewon to stop the incessant line of questioning. But they all knew that Chaewon was never going to let Hyunjin off of the hook.

With a sigh, Hyunjin finally relented.

“Ok fine! I thought she was super hot when we met, and she kept, like, giving me the eyes or whatever. It was freaking me out but also was really attractive? Plus, she’s tiny but acts all tough and I think that’s so cute.”

Chaewon proceeded to gag so convincingly that Jungeun genuinely thought the blonde had thrown up in her car and was ready to leave her on the side of the road.

“Shut up, you asked! Anyways, after you guys made that group chat with the six of us to make plans for tonight, she messaged me privately and just, like, asked about my day and interests and stuff. And we have been texting pretty much non-stop since. She’s so interesting and thoughtful and beautiful and... I’m gay.”

Jungeun’s heart warmed for her friend. Hyunjin needed somebody to love. Maybe Heejin could be that somebody. They definitely seemed like they’d suit each other.

“Awwww! Hyunjin that’s so cute! I love it when you get all soft and mushy.”

Yerim practically jumped on Hyunjin’s lap in the backseat, grip like a koala. Of course, Hyunjin was just as much of a hugger as Yerim, and the two stayed like that until Jungeun loudly honked her horn to get them to separate.

“Alright, well now we have two missions tonight. Mission one: determine if Jinsol likes Jungeun as much as Jungeun likes Jinsol. Well, that’s actually impossible, because I think Jungeun would literally sell one of her kidneys just to see Jinsol smile. So basically just see if there is any reciprocity there. Mission two: Get Hyunjin and Heejin alone together, because Heejin already seems like a confident gay and so we just need to present the opportunity for her to take. God Jungeun, you should learn a thing or two from her, maybe then it wouldn’t take you two years to finally talk to your cru-”

Jungeun interrupted Chaewon’s debriefing to hit her, again. At that point, Chaewon’s left arm might as well have been a punching bag.

“If you don’t shut up I will tell that new girl Hyejoo that you got detention for being late five times since you insist on walking her to all of her classes even though it’s been like two months and she knows where everything is now.”

Chaewon froze.

“Alright. Truce.”

-

Jinsol and Heejin were already at the bowling alley by the time Jungeun and her friends arrived. As they entered, the group spotted the girls tying up their bowling shoes.

The bowling alley wasn’t huge. There were six lanes in total, and the pair were stationed at the one closest to the far wall. Chaewon’s face lit up as she eyed the concession stand directly across from the entrance and Jungeun had to drag her back on track.

Yerim was the first to greet Jinsol and Heejin, having sprinted over immediately, and tackled them both into bear hugs.

Hyunjin wasn’t too far behind, following Yerim’s suit by hugging Jinsol, who looked more ready than the first time, but hesitated at Heejin. The two instead shyly smiled at each other and exchanged greetings before Heejin was pulled into a “bro hug” by Chaewon.

Jungeun was the last to arrive, using her friend’s antics as a stalling technique so she could build up a bit more of her courage and try to calm her beating heart and frantic mind.

She felt like she might finally get an idea of where she stood with Jinsol by the end of the night. They’d had enough instances that tiptoed the line between friends and more, and it seemed as though they’d reached a tipping point.

Jungeun was around 75% sure that her feelings were reciprocal. As she got to know Jinsol better, and after she re-analyzed their interactions with the information that Jinsol was likely questioning her sexuality, it seemed more and more plausible.

But still, her rational brain wouldn’t forget the fact that there was at least a 25% chance she was reading way too far into their interactions, and Jinsol could have been concerned over literally anything else.

Jungeun hoped that by the time she returned home, she’d have an answer. Either the two were destined to remain friends, even classmates, or Jungeun might finally have a stroke of luck go her way.

She approached Jinsol slowly, not wanting to interrupt the conversation brewing between the older girl and Hyunjin, but the minute Jinsol noticed her, her eyes lit up and Hyunjin may as well not have been standing there.

Jinsol instantly wrapped her arms around Jungeun’s waist, gripping her tightly as she hugged her. Jungeun would never get tired of that feeling, and missed it instantly when Jinsol pulled away.

“Hi! How are you? How was the drive? It is really starting to get cold out there and I heard it was supposed to snow tonight. Does your car have winter tires? Or all wheel drive?”

Jungeun was unfazed by the bombardment of questions. She learned quickly that rambling was common when Jinsol was excited or nervous. It was adorable.

“I’m good. The drive was good, it was only like 15 minutes. I checked the forecast before I left and apparently it isn’t supposed to snow anymore. Yes I have winter tires but they aren’t on yet. No I don’t have all wheel drive. Anything else?”

Jinsol blushed slightly and stepped a little closer to Jungeun so her next comment wasn’t overheard.

“You look pretty.”

Jungeun’s heart almost burst out of her chest. Her eyes shot up to meet Jinsol’s, and was greeted with a now familiar fondness, which caused her eyes to instead become very interested in the neon shoelaces of Jinsol’s bowling shoes.

The two hours spent agonizing over her outfit were definitely worth the effort.

After mumbling a shy thank you, and not missing the proud smile Jinsol began sporting, Jungeun’s attention was brought back to the group, with Heejin asking how they were going to pick teams.

Yerim and Chaewon immediately looked at each other and scrambled to grab each other’s arms.

“Yerim and I are a team and will not be separated for the entire night. No arguments,” Chaewon stated.

Jungeun rolled her eyes. Subtlety was never their strong point.

“Well Jinsol is terrible so I don’t want to be on a team with her.”

Jinsol gasped in offence at Heejin’s comment.

“I’m terrible? Last time we went you didn’t even hit a pin until the eighth round!”

“The oil on the lane was all funky. It kept swerving my ball in the wrong direction!”

Jinsol rolled her eyes. “Fine. Agree to disagree.”

Heejin nodded, before turning her head towards Hyunjin.

“Will you please be my partner? Everyone kept hyping you up in the group chat and I need someone who is actually good,” Heejin asked, batting her eyelashes and twirling her hair.

Hyunjin looked as though she was caught in a trance, eyes locked on Heejin’s lips. Jungeun kicked her calf hard to get her to snap out of it.

“What? Oh, yeah, of course I’ll be your partner.” Hyunjin forced her gaze away from Heejin and towards Chaewon. “As long as I can kick your ass I don’t care who I’m with.”

Chaewon’s eyes narrowed. “You’re on, Bigfoot.”

Jinsol poked Jungeun’s arm, remnants of her illustration still present. Damn permanent marker.

“Guess that means you’re stuck with me. Again.”

“I think this time, you’re the one getting the short end of the stick. I’m really bad at bowling,” Jungeun admitted sheepishly.

Jinsol just smiled adorably as Jungeun led the two of them to the till and asked the clerk for her size in bowling shoes.

“That’s ok. I’m not very competitive, not like Hyunjin and Chaewon seem to be. I’m just happy to be spending time with you.”

Jungeun’s eyebrows raised at the honesty, causing Jinsol to follow suit as she realized what her lack of filter had let slip out.

“Um, and your friends too! They seem really cool, albeit a bit intimidating.”

“Don’t worry, they already really like you. Chaewon is convinced you are a part of some secret biker gang or something like that. She jokes that you are too cool to be hanging around us.”

Jinsol’s nose scrunched up.

“I forget that’s my image at school. You own one leather jacket and miss a few classes and suddenly you’re a high school badass. If only they knew I build gundams and do math puzzles in my spare time.”

Jungeun chuckled, thanking the clerk when he brought her shoes to the counter.

“I mean, I could tell them that if you wanted me too.”

Jinsol’s eyes widened in fear.

“Don’t you dare, you promised you wouldn’t tell a soul about my secret nerd habits.”

Jungeun smiled mischievously, shrugging as she walked away with her shoes in hand, leaving Jinsol hurriedly scrambling after her.

-

In an unexpected turn of events, Heejin was almost as bad as Jungeun, and Jinsol was nowhere near as bad as Heejin implied.

Jinsol clearly had played before, and she rarely got a score below a 7. In fact, by some miracle, Jinsol was dragging Jungeun’s useless butt into first place, much to the anger of both Chaewon and Hyunjin.

For every zero Jungeun would score, Jinsol would score a strike, earning a varied response of cheers and groans. But the loudest cheer of the night came when Jungeun somehow got a strike, and Jinsol shrieked like a maniac and jumped up to pull Jungeun into a bone-crushing hug, spinning her around in delight.

If she knew she’d get a reaction like that every time she scored a strike, Jungeun would have taken bowling up a long time ago.

Since Jungeun and Jinsol sewed up first place fairly early on, Hyunjin and Chaewon were battling for second.

Chaewon had an unorthodox method, taking as long as humanly possible to take her turn, which earned quite a few groans in protest. However, it seemed to work for her, and she racked up a decent score.

Yerim was primarily concerned with supervising the two brewing couples, doing her best to play matchmaker whenever she could. She forced numerous seat changes to allow for better proximity and even sent Jungeun and Jinsol to get sodas for all of them, and dragging Chaewon to the bathroom so Hyunjin and Heejin could be alone.

She really was doing the absolute most, but her score faltered in consequence. She only managed to beat Heejin and Jungeun’s scores, which wasn’t anything to boast about.

Hyunjin had the best technique of all of them by far, and she even had the highest individual score by the end, but was being dragged down by her teammate’s complete lack of any sort of athletic ability.

Heejin was, quite possibly, the worst bowling player any of the girls had seen.

Hyunjin getting a spare was more common than Heejin hitting more than one pin, which meant they just barely finished below Chaewon and Yerim.

On a normal day, Chaewon would be teasing the taller girl endlessly and Hyunjin would be curled into a ball on the verge of tears. But this wasn’t a normal day.

One look at the sadness and guilt on Heejin’s face, and Hyunjin’s despair was instantly forgotten, her primary concern instead to assure the smaller girl she didn’t really care about winning. Heejin didn’t believe her in the slightest but visibly melted at the attempt.

Chaewon understood the situation, again showing incredible restraint, and Hyunjin silently thanked her, even if she knew the blonde would immediately unleash the floodgates the minute they were alone.

They all agreed to play another game under the guise of Heejin and Hyunjin’s redemption, but really none of them were ready to leave just yet. Jungeun had never thought that her group of four needed anyone else, but Heejin and Jinsol were filling a space none of them knew was present.

Jungeun offered to get food for the group in between games, and Heejin instantly volunteered to go with her.

As they were waiting for their order, Heejin broke the comfortable silence.

“So when are you going to make a move on Jinsol?”

Junguen’s eyes nearly popped out of their sockets, and she frantically looked around for assurance that the girl in question was nowhere nearby.

“What? I have no idea what you are talking about. Why would I make a move on her? We are just friends,” Jungeun said, too rushed and panicked to be anything close to believable.

Heejin rolled her eyes. “Oh come on Jungeun, it’s been obvious from the start. Well, to me anyways. Jinsol probably still has no idea.”

They both spared a glance in Jinsol’s direction, who was laughing at something Chaewon said.

Jungeun instantly felt a smile appear on her face when she saw Jinsol’s own beaming grin, but it disappeared when she felt Heejin poke her cheek.

“See, that’s what I’m talking about. It’s obvious when you look for it. I’ve had my suspicions since last year when you bumped into us in the hallway and nearly shit your pants when you made eye contact with Jinsol.”

Jungeun remembered that day, her clumsiness making an idiot of herself in front of Jinsol. She was barely able to stammer out an apology before she sprinted in the opposite direction.

“Ok fine, you got me. But why do you assume I have to be the one to make a move?”

“Come on, this is Jinsol who we’re talking about. She wouldn’t know someone had feelings for her even if they told her outright. You’re going to have to make the first move.”

Jungeun had figured she would have to be the one to initiate anything with Jinsol, but a part of her was hoping Jinsol would suddenly come to her senses and do some grand, romantic gesture for her. Clearly that was even less likely than she’d originally thought.

Heejin noticed the hesitation on Jungeun’s face and instantly softened.

“Hey, for what it’s worth, I’m pretty sure she feels the same way. You never know with her since she often doesn’t even know things herself, but if you give her the opportunity I think she’ll take it,” Heejin said, a reassuring smile on her face.

Jungeun nodded. Maybe Jinsol just needed to know that Jungeun was an option, and that Jungeun had feelings for her, and a switch would flip in the dark haired girl’s mind.

At least Jungeun wasn’t the only one who suspected that Jinsol had feelings for her.

“Let’s hope so,” Jungeun sighed, sparing another glance at Jinsol.

“You’d be good for her. I’m rooting for you kiddo.” Heejin placed a hand on Jungeun’s shoulder, reminiscent of a dad encouraging his child.

“I’m older than you, loser,” Jungeun said as she shrugged the hand off.

Just as their order arrived, Jungeun heard her name being called from somewhere nearby. She turned to look at the lane adjacent to their own, and she was met with her popular “friends,” them having recently entered the bowling alley.

Her eyes instinctively looked to the ceiling in exasperation when she noticed Mingyu among them. Oh brother.

“I’ll take these back to the girls. It looks like your presence is desired elsewhere.” Heejin winked and headed back to their lane, and Jungeun briefly heard the squeals of excitement at the food as she made her way over to the popular crew.

Luckily, she didn’t dislike the entire group of her newfound friends. The “it couple” of the school, student class president Haseul and head cheerleader Vivi, were always nice to her. In another life, Jungeun thought the three of them could be good friends.

Haseul’s voice was the one who called her over, and she greeted Jungeun with a beaming smile and a hug. Vivi, seated behind Haseul, just saluted at her entrance.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt, you just haven’t ate lunch with us in a few days and I wanted to see how you were doing!” Haseul explained with ever present enthusiasm.

Jungeun had eventually relented and began spending a few lunches a week with the popular crew. She got tired of continuously turning them down, and she did enjoy Haseul and Vivi’s presence enough to make it somewhat worth her time.

However, it did mean she had to be in the same vicinity as Mingyu, who had finally noticed Jungeun’s presence and bounded over.

“Hey Jungeun. You look good tonight, want to stay and play with us?”

Vivi kicked the back of his leg from behind.

“She’s here with her other friends stupid. Hasn’t she turned you down enough times for you to get the message?”

Mingyu flipped her off without turning his attention away from Jungeun, and Vivi made mocking faces at his back in response.

“Alright, maybe next time just the two of us can come to a place like this. I heard the food is great,” Mingyu said with a smirk.

“It’s a bowling alley. The food is crap. Just go put your shoes on before you embarrass yourself any further,” Haseul said as she shooed him away, already brewing up an apology.

“Sorry about him. He means well, really. He’s just a very persistent idiot who doesn’t know you are gay.”

Jungeun had informed Vivi and Haseul of her sexuality fairly early on, particularly when they tried to encourage Jungeun to accept Mingyu’s incessant courtship. The three of them had a good laugh at that.

Jungeun even asked them for some advice regarding Jinsol, but all they had to say was for her to stop being a pussy and go for it, which wasn’t particularly helpful.

“Yeah I know, it does get annoying telling him no every time though.”

Haseul nodded. “Of course. I’ll try and talk some sense into him again, or at least try and divert his attention to someone else.”

“Sorry we called you over by the way, we wanted to wish you good luck with your girl.” Vivi stood up and wrapped an arm around Haseul, the latter instinctively leaning into the embrace.

Jungeun sighed, turning back towards her friends, and was surprised to Jinsol’s gaze already on her. Jungeun could barely make out the “Everything ok?” Jinsol mouthed, but she nodded in response.

Jinsol nodded as well, but kept her gaze firmly locked on the group, Mingyu in particular.

“Thanks. I’m hoping tonight I can finally figure out where we stand.”

Haseul and Vivi nodded in sync. “That’s good! And remember, don’t be a pussy. If you don’t make a move you’ll always regret it,” Vivi warned, with Haseul visibly in agreeance.

“God, why does everyone keep telling me that. Maybe she’ll be the one to make a move?” Jungeun questioned, but she was met with only glares from the couple in front of her.

“Right, fine. I get it. Have a good evening guys, I’ll let you know how it goes on Monday.”

Haseul slapped Jungeun’s retreating butt in support, causing Jungeun to let out a little squeal.

“You got this Jungeun!”

Jungeun just laughed and finally made her way back to her friends.

Did she though?

-

Unfortunately for Heejin and Hyunjin, the second game proceeded almost identically to the first. Despite Hyunjin’s many attempts to help the smaller girl, getting much too close to simply be “adjusting her technique,” Heejin was somehow doing worse than before. She eventually gave up halfway through, content in watching Hyunjin succeed without her.

If the look on her face was any indication, she found it incredibly attractive every time Hyunjin got a strike and proceeded to laugh and point at Chaewon.

Jinsol and Jungeun were in front, again, despite Jungeun having just hit a gutterball, again. She was gearing up for her second shot when someone loudly cleared their throat from the lane beside her.

Unsurprisingly, it was Mingyu, smirk plastered on his face.

“Hey Jungeun, if you need some pointers just let me know. I’m basically a pro bowler. Watch this.”

He took a breath to steady himself, face suddenly deep in concentration, and proceeded to throw the ball with more force than the six girls combined and about a foot too high in the air.

The ball ended up bouncing over his lane’s gutter and onto Jungeun’s lane, eventually ending up in the gutter on her side.

Even in the dim lighting of the bowling alley, his red face was clear as day to anyone in the general proximity.

Both his own friends and Jungeun’s started to laugh at the poor boy, Vivi peeled over in her seat and coughing uncontrollably.

Jinsol, however, showed no sign of amusement. Her eyes were still firmly fixed on the back of Mingyu’s head, where they had been since he had first approached Jungeun. Jungeun had noticed it but decided against commenting since she was fairly certain of the reason behind the dark haired girl’s seemingly questionable action.

Jinsol was jealous.

Every time Mingyu even looked in Jungeun’s general direction, Jinsol immediately grabbed her hand to hold it or brought her into conversation.

Jungeun couldn’t say she wasn’t enjoying the attention.

While everyone else was still laughing at Mingyu, Jinsol stood up and walked towards Jungeun.

Jungeun was more focused on her growing annoyance, not just at Mingyu’s consistently ridiculous behaviour but at the fact that her turn had just been taken for her. So she was surprised when she felt an arm snake around her waist, slightly squeezing her side.

Making sure Mingyu was watching, Jinsol leaned into Jungeun from behind, with Jungeun immediately overwhelmed at the feeling of Jinsol’s warm body pressed up against her back.

Jungeun’s breath hitched as Jinsol leaned closer towards Jungeun’s ear, close enough for Jungeun to feel the girl’s breath on her skin.

“If he doesn’t quit bothering you, I’m going to kick his ass. You have my word on that.”

Jungeun exhaled shakily, and slowly turned to look into Jinsol’s eyes. The fire in them scared her at first, but she recognized the concern that followed when she forced Jinsol’s gaze away from Mingyu and towards herself.

“Thank you,” Jungeun whispered.

She wasn’t sure if Jinsol was capable of kicking Mingyu’s ass, the boy was a football player after all, and Jinsol was as soft as they come, but she definitely didn’t want to find out.

Jinsol just nodded and spared one last glance in Mingyu’s direction. Judging by the way he was sulking, her job was done.

As Jungeun headed back towards her seat, Jinsol ran her hand down Jungeun’s arm, stopping when she reached her hand to give it one last squeeze, before turning her attention back to the game at hand.

Jungeun’s heart was beating at a mile a minute. She didn’t expect Jinsol to be quite so jealous and possessive. It was pretty hot.

When Jungeun shakily sat down next to Yerim, her and Chaewon, sat on the other side of Jungeun, both started incessantly slapping Jungeun’s arms.

“Ow! What the hell!” Jungeun whisper yelled, not wanting to disturb the others.

“Don’t what the hell us! What the hell yourself! You and Jinsol just had one of the most homosexually charged encounters I’ve ever witnessed.” Chaewon was basically whisper screaming at that point, the shock on her face evident.

“Seriously Jungeun. Seeing how jealous she got over that meathead’s sad attempt at flirting with you, I don’t think you should have any doubt over her feelings whatsoever,” Yerim said, thankfully in a normal whisper.

Jungeun was silent, but the small smile threatening to appear on her face betrayed her.

“Yeah, I kind of figured that out already.”

“If you don’t make a move tonight I swear to god I will sneak into your room at night and move EVERYTHING around so nothing is in its proper place,” Chaewon threatened.

Jungeun’s eyes widened. “Yes I know! God, no need to start talking crazy or anything. I’m just waiting for the right moment to bring it up. We haven’t really gotten the chance to be alone or anything.”

That stumped her two friends. A bowling alley wasn’t exactly the most private of settings, and Jungeun still had to drive the other three girls home.

That was, until Yerim had an idea.

“Oh! I can get my mom to come get us! She offered to drive us here tonight but I told her you would, but I could make something up about you having to leave early so she can come!”

Jungeun sighed. “Well yeah, that would help. But what about Heejin?”

Before anyone could come up with a solution, the girl in question came bounding up to the group, Hyunjin hot on her tail.

“Guys! Look what Hyunjin won me!” In her arms was a huge stuffed bear. Jungeun had barely noticed the arcade, it was hidden in one of the corners of the bowling alley.

“Aw, Hyunjin, you won your girlfriend something but not me?” Chaewon pouted in mockery. It was only so long before the blonde couldn’t keep her comments to herself. Jungeun was proud she’d lasted as long as she did.

She received the desired response from the taller girl, with Hyunjin going beet red in an instant and slapped Chaewon’s shoulder.

“Shut up gremlin,” Hyunjin murmured.

Jinsol finally returned from taking her turn, and the final results appeared up on the board.

Jungeun and Jinsol unsurprisingly finished first, but what was surprising was that Hyunjin, basically by herself, finished ahead of Chaewon and Yerim.

Five jaws dropped, all but Hyunjin’s. The shit-eating grin on her face was indicative of what was to follow.

“Ha! You see that shit? I managed to kick your ass ALONE. And you tried so hard! Honestly I don’t even know why you wake up in the morning, it must be awful knowing you’ll never be as good as me in ANYTHING.” Hyunjin paused. “Except Mario Kart, but I’m still convinced you cheat somehow.”

Chaewon simply nodded in response, having been both the giver and receiver of such incessant bragging many times. It was tradition.

“You have bested me. I concede to you, the almighty Kim Hyunjin. I will buy you lunch for the next week, as per our agreement.” The agreement was set only weeks into the friendship, and involved the loser conceding to the winner both their pride and their lunch money.

Jungeun found it ridiculous. She leaned over to Jinsol.

“I’m sorry they are such idiots. I hope you still had fun tonight,” Jungeun whispered.

Jinsol, bewildered by the situation that unfolded in front of her, took a minute to acknowledge Jungeun.

“Oh, yeah no I had fun, don’t worry. They aren’t nearly as crazy as you made them out to be. But they are definitely more intense than I had imagined…”

Heejin’s phone suddenly buzzed, and when she pulled it out, her face fell.

“Shit, my sister just texted me asking if I can pick her up from the movies. Jinsol, can you find another way home?”

Chaewon immediately grabbed Jinsol’s arm.

“JUNGEUN CAN TAKE YOU!”

The group fell silent at Chaewon’s outburst, which caused the blonde to collect herself.

“I mean, Yerim’s mom is coming to take the three of us home so Jungeun would be more than happy to give you a ride, right Jungeun?” All five girls looked expectantly at Jungeun.

“Um, yeah sure! If it is ok with you?” Jungeun replied, question aimed at Jinsol.

“Yeah, that’s ok with me.” There was The Look. As they stared at each other, Jungeun was fairly confident that she had uncovered every little emotion that comprised it.

“Perfect, thanks Jungeun. And thank you guys for inviting me tonight, it was super fun. Hopefully we can do something like this again soon.”

Heejin said that last part looking directly at Hyunjin, grip still firm on the large stuffed animal in her arms.

Hyunjin gulped. “Can I walk you to your car?”

Heejin just smiled in response, pulling Hyunjin by her hand towards the exit.

“Say hi to Yeojin for me!” Jinsol yelled at Heejin’s retreating figure.

“Well thank goodness we managed to not cockblock their entire night,” Chaewon exclaimed. “Those crazy kids might just fall in love.”

“That’d be nice! More of a reason for all of us to hang out,” Jinsol smiled.

“Yeah! If only there was another couple in our group for them to double date with though…” Chaewon trailed off. Jungeun never wanted to smack the smirk off of her face more than in that moment.

Before Jinsol could muster up a reply, Hyunjin came bolting back into the bowling alley.

“I ASKED HER OUT.”

Yerim gasped. “You? Are you serious?”

“No way in hell I’m believing that,” Chaewon scoffed.

“It’s true! She was about to get into her car but I asked her if she wanted to go see a movie next Friday. Well, I said it so fast it didn’t really sound like a language but she understood! And said yes!” Jungeun couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen Hyunjin this elated. It was a good look for her.

“Yay! I’m so proud of you!” Yerim engulfed the taller girl in a hug, squeezing with all her might.

Much to everyone’s surprise, Chaewon followed suit.

“I knew you had it in you,” Chaewon said, then proceeded to wipe a fake tear off of her cheek. “I can’t believe you asked her out instead of the other way around. You’ve just made Jungeun look like the biggest puss-”

“Oh! My mom is here!” Yerim interrupted, to Jungeun’s immense relief. She knew what was on the end of that sentence and she did not want to hear it.

“Bye Jungie! Bye Jinsol! See you guys on Monday!” Yerim squealed as Chaewon and Hyunjin dragged her out of the bowling alley.

Jungeun sighed, glad to finally be rid of her chaotic friends, and was immediately calmed when Jinsol appeared by her side.

“I’m ready to go when you are.”

Meeting Jinsol’s adoring, albeit slightly hesitant, gaze, Jungeun wasn’t sure how she was going to make it through the rest of the night alive.

-

The drive to Jinsol’s house had been unusually quiet. The only noise was coming from the steady hum of the engine and Jungeun’s Red Velvet playlist, which Jungeun had made specifically for Jinsol since they were her favourite group.

The silence between the two girls was deafening from Jungeun’s perspective. Every so often Jungeun would glance in Jinsol’s direction only to see the girl focused on the passing houses out the window or on her phone.

For each passing second, Jungeun grew even more antsy. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to confess if Jinsol had barely looked her way since they had left the bowling alley.

As Jungeun turned on to Jinsol’s street, Jungeun decided she couldn’t take it anymore.

“Is everything okay? I know you said you had fun tonight but you haven’t really said anything since we left my friends and I know they’re insane but I love them and I hope they didn’t freak you out or anything.” Jungeun took in a deep breath, having spewed all of that in a matter of seconds.

Jinsol finally looked towards Jungeun’s direction, her face incredibly hard to read. Jungeun had gotten used to knowing the dark haired girl pretty well, so she didn’t like this new uncertainty.

“It wasn’t that. Trust me, I liked them,” Jinsol assured, as the car slowly pulled up in front of Jinsol’s house. Jungeun spared a glance around, surprised to find nobody frequenting the sidewalks, despite the semi-late hour of 10:00.

Jungeun liked Jinsol’s neighbourhood. While visibly lower class compared to Jungeun’s, the charm was undeniable. Whenever Jungeun would drop Jinsol off after a tutoring session, the community was bustling with people of all ages.

There was a city park right across from Jinsol’s house, with a small field for dogs and a playground for the kids. Jinsol said she had always wanted a dog growing up, but with her mother so busy, it was never really an option.

Jungeun loved it. She dreamed of living in a tight-knit neighbourhood such as Jinsol’s, where everyone knew everyone. Maybe one day.

Jinsol cleared her throat from the passenger seat, bringing Jungeun’s attention back to her. They had been sitting outside Jinsol’s house for at least a few minutes, yet Jinsol didn’t look like she was quite ready to leave.

“Do you have to be home right away?” Jinsol asked cautiously, almost seeming like she wanted Jungeun to say yes.

“No, my parents are out of town this weekend. Why, what’s up?”

Jinsol sighed. Jungeun could sense the unrest from the older girl, she just wasn’t sure what it’s cause was.

“Let’s go play at the park.”

Jinsol was out of the car without even finishing her sentence, leaving Jungeun alone in her car.

This was it. The perfect opportunity. Neither of them had anywhere to be. Nobody was around to interrupt them. If Jungeun didn’t make a move then, she wasn’t sure she ever would.

Leaving her worries behind her, Jungeun hastily walked towards the playground.

She found Jinsol sitting on the bottom of a double slide and sat beside her.

“Are you going to tell me what is wrong?” Jungeun asked gently, after a few more moments of quiet.

Jinsol didn’t respond immediately, obviously plagued by what was on her mind.

“I just have been thinking a lot lately.”

That wasn’t very descriptive.

“About what?” Jungeun prodded.

Jinsol looked down, her foot playing with the rocks as she spoke. “Me.” A pause. “And you.”

Jungeun’s eyes widened. Oh.

“Me?”

Jinsol finally looked up at Jungeun, her eyes screaming for resolution.

“Yeah. You’ve kind of messed up my head pretty bad,” Jinsol chuckled.

Jungeun frowned. She hadn’t meant to do that. But that statement made it much easier for Jungeun to understand what Jinsol was so upset about.

Jungeun cleared her throat. This was her chance.

“Well, you haven’t exactly done my head any good either. It’s hard to focus on anything when all I think about is you.”

It was Jinsol’s turn to be surprised. “Really?”

Jungeun scoffed. “What do you mean really? I thought it was obvious.”

Jinsol just stared blankly at her, not seeming to register what was happening, causing Jungeun to look away in embarrassment. How dense could Jinsol be?

It was only then that Jungeun realized they had slowly been drifting closer to each other. The slide already didn’t leave much room for two people, but their bodies were almost touching.

Jungeun looked back up at Jinsol to see her face a lot closer, but with the same confused look plastered on it.

“Do you get what I’m trying to say? Because I honestly don’t think I’ll be able to say it outri-”

Jungeun was interrupted by a pair of soft lips tentatively pressed against her own. Her eyes widened in shock and she pulled back on instinct, but not far.

Their eyes met, faces still close enough to feel each other’s breath. Jungeun scanned Jinsol’s features, seeing the panic immediately start to rise at Jungeun’s retreat.

Before Jinsol could pull away completely, Jungeun gently placed her hand on Jinsol’s cheek, caressing her cheekbone with her thumb. She felt Jinsol’s face warm up at the action, and saw the dark haired girl’s eyes flutter back to her lips.

They both simultaneously leaned in, and the feeling of Jinsol’s lips against Junguen’s again was pure euphoria.

Jungeun had dreamt of what kissing Jinsol would be like for over 2 years, and yet it was nothing like she could have imagined in all the best ways.

It was hesitant at first, both clearly inexperienced and worried about scaring the other off. Their noses often bumped into each other and it took a moment to find the rhythm, but once they did, Jungeun wondered what the hell took them so long.

Jinsol kissed her slowly but firmly, lovingly but with so much desire that it threw Jungeun through so many loops she didn’t know which way was up. Their lips seemed to fit perfectly together, and Jungeun wasn’t sure she’d ever be able to stop.

After what felt like hours, but had likely only been a minute or so, Jinsol pulled away.

Jungeun blindly tried to chase her, refusing to open her eyes and let the moment end, but Jinsol’s hand being pressed against the younger girl’s knee was enough of a signal to stop.

Jungeun felt like she was on cloud 9, and she opened her eyes with a dopey grin on her face.

“You know, everyone thought I was going to have to be the one to make the first move. Their faith was clearly misplaced,” Jungeun joked, but her demeanor instantly changed when she really looked at the girl in front of her.

Jinsol was as white as a ghost, any trace of a blush gone from her face. Even under the dim lighting of the streep lamps, Jungeun could tell the girl was rattled.

“I-I’m sorry,” was all Jinsol said as she backed away from Jungeun.

“What? What are you sorry for? Jinsol where are you going?” Jungeun started to panic and stood up to step towards Jinsol.

“No! Please, don’t follow me. I’m so sorry, I just can’t do this right now.” A few tears had started falling down Jinsol’s cheeks, each one tearing Jungeun’s heart into pieces.

“Jinsol I can help you, just please don’t leave,” Jungeun begged, but followed her request and stayed put.

“I need to do this on my own. I’m sorry, Jungeun.”

As snow started to trickle down from above, Jinsol turned and crossed the street before running into her house.

Jungeun sat back down onto the slide, bewildered at what had just happened, feeling tears of her own fall just as frantically as her thoughts had become.

She’d just had the best kiss of her life only for Jinsol to do the one thing Jungeun never thought she would do.

Leave.


	3. 3

The more Jungeun stared at her lunch, the more unappetizing it became. Maybe she didn’t need to eat lunch. She’d eaten a big breakfast, her parents had made her do so, and she wasn’t feeling her best.

Yerim noticed Jungeun starting to put her lunch away and nudged her slightly, encouraging her to eat it anyways. It wasn’t the first time the girl had tried to skip out on lunch, and as much as Yerim was sympathetic, their championship game was later that day.

Jungeun should have been ecstatic. She had led her team, in her first year as captain, to the divisional championships against their biggest rivals. The season had been incredible and it had all led up to one final match.

Except, Jungeun couldn’t be further from ecstatic.

She was miserable.

It had been two weeks since the last time she’d seen Jinsol. Two weeks since they’d kissed. Two weeks since she’d last had hope that things might have finally worked out for the two of them.

In that time, Jinsol had been ghosting her. She didn’t respond to the few texts Jungeun sent. Jungeun called her once, but she never really expected an answer then either. Jungeun almost went to Jinsol’s house to confront her, but Jinsol’s pleads to give her space were still ringing in Jungeun’s ears.

Jinsol had also dropped out of the tutoring program. Ms. Ha didn’t seem too concerned, Jinsol’s marks had improved substantially since the semester began, but did question Jungeun on whether or not the girl was actually ready to be on her own.

Jungeun, as upset as she was, respected Jinsol’s request once more, and assured Ms. Ha that Jinsol barely even needed her in the first place.

Jungeun also had started to hate chemistry. A subject she used to love only reminded her of Jinsol. The dark haired girl was barely on time to class, pretended Jungeun didn’t exist throughout the lecture, and always ran out the second the bell rang without even a glance in Jungeun’s general vicinity. It was excruciating.

Jungeun never thought she could miss a pair of eyes more than she missed Jinsol’s.

The only one who was in contact with Jinsol was Heejin.

Every lunch, Jungeun would practically beg for updates on the older girl, which Heejin would gladly provide.

Heejin was just as sympathetic as the rest of them, frankly shocked at Jinsol’s seemingly out-of-character actions. She kept promising Jungeun she’d get to the bottom of Jinsol’s behaviour, but Jungeun didn’t need that.

She knew exactly why Jinsol was avoiding her. She just didn’t know what she could do about it.

Jinsol was obviously struggling with her sexuality. Jungeun had known that for a long time. She didn’t expect the older girl to recoil as much as she had, but Jungeun knew their kiss, and what it meant, would have been a shock to her system.

That was why she had accepted Jinsol’s wishes, and largely left her alone to deal with this issue herself, even though it physically pained Jungeun every time she thought about it.

She wished Jinsol would let her support her through the process.

She wished Jinsol would talk to her about what was going on in her head.

She wished Jinsol hadn’t left her, in the snow, alone.

But she did. And as much as Jungeun understood and felt for Jinsol, Jungeun was hurt.

With each passing day, and with it, no word from Jinsol, that hurt went a little deeper, and any hope of Jinsol coming back went down with it.

Jungeun sighed before begrudgingly opening her lunch back up, earning a small smile from Yerim.

Heejin and Hyunjin were sat across the table, so engrossed in each other that they hadn’t noticed Jungeun’s sorrow. Or they were just used to it.

The one good thing that had come out of the events of bowling night was Heejin and Hyunjin unofficially becoming girlfriends.

They basically acted like they were together, but without the label. Chaewon said it was because they were both too chicken to ask the other, but they obviously had no rush.

As much as Jungeun loved Hyunjin, and was growing to really like Heejin, the sight of them being all lovey-dovey broke her heart even more than it already was.

Just another reminder of what could have been.

Jungeun had her eyes fixed on the two, gaze a mix of both anger and despair.

Chaewon noticed almost immediately, and exchanged a few glances between the brunette and the couple, before standing up.

“Alright, that’s enough. Heejin, you’re going to have to switch seats with me for the foreseeable future. No, I will not say why.”

Hyunjin and Heejin looked at Chaewon incredulously, not understanding in the slightest. Chaewon rolled her eyes and vaguely gestured in Jungeun’s direction.

That got the point across, and Heejin immediately switched places with Chaewon. But not before leaving a quick kiss on Hyunjin’s cheek, causing the girl to immediately turn bright red even though that was at least the tenth time that lunch.

Yerim, noticing Jungeun’s immediate embarrassment at having been such a bother, decided to change the subject.

“So! The championship game is tonight! You guys are all coming, I assume?”

She received three vigorous nods in response.

“Yes! I’m so excited, I’ve never been to a school soccer game before! No offense, but I never really saw the appeal. But now I do!” Heejin exclaimed, hoping her excitement might rub off on a certain someone.

“You guys better kick Western’s ass! Those pricks always think they’re better than us. Just wait until next year, I’ve been planning the perfect senior prank since I was 7,” Chaewon grinned, a terrifying glint in her eye.

Jungeun finally finished her sandwich, much to Yerim’s delight, and turned to ask Heejin the one question that had been plaguing her mind for days.

“Do you know if Jinsol is coming?”

The table fell silent, all eyes on Heejin. She nervously glanced around, and sighed when she met Jungeun’s desperate gaze.

“Honestly, I don’t know. I asked her a few days ago, saying we all missed her and wanted her to come, but she said she might have to work. I tried to convince her to call in sick but then she snapped at me and I haven’t really heard from her since…” Heejin trailed off.

That was not the answer Jungeun was hoping for.

“Oh. Okay. Thanks anyways.”

Jungeun’s last sliver of hope was that Jinsol would show up at the game, with her big, dorky sign, and they could finally have a chance to talk.

But even that didn’t look like it was happening.

Jungeun felt like giving up. Moving on.

A few weeks prior, she would have said she’d have waited a lifetime for Jinsol to figure out her sexuality, if it meant they could be together.

She wasn’t sure if that was still true.

Yerim noticed Jungeun starting to spiral into a storm of hopelessness, and rapidly stood up.

“Jungeun and I are going to go for a walk for the rest of lunch. We’ll see you all at the game!”

Yerim grabbed Jungeun’s hand, barely giving the girl time to gather her stuff, and hastily dragged them out of the cafeteria and into the courtyard.

It was late November, so the courtyard was slightly deserted, most electing to stay inside where it was warmer. Jungeun was still bewildered at the fact that girl’s soccer was played in the autumn, especially considering it was supposed to snow that weekend.

Yerim found a small bench underneath a large, stone archway, surrounded by trees and shrubs that were mostly bare. It would have been an eerie atmosphere if it wasn’t for the rainbow painted pathway decorating the whole yard.

“Alright, I know you don’t like to talk about your feelings and 99% of the time I respect that as much as it pains me. But this time, I’m playing the best friend card and demanding you spill your guts out right now.”

Yerim wasn’t often scary, but Jungeun was a little terrified at the seriousness of the younger girl’s demand.

Jungeun had excluded as many details as possible when her friends had questioned her about her and Jinsol. Not wanting to divulge Jinsol’s personal information, Jungeun only said that whatever Jungeun thought was happening between them wasn’t going to happen, which wasn’t a lie.

They were all expecting to be greeted with wonderful news, and were shocked when it was anything but. Nevertheless, they stuck to their duty as friends admirably, Chaewon even offered to egg Jinsol’s house, which Jungeun immediately informed was out of the question.

However, Yerim evidently wasn’t satisfied, and Jungeun wasn’t sure she’d let them leave if Jungeun didn’t tell her the full story.

After swearing an oath of confidentiality, even though Jungeun knew Yerim would never spill a secret, even on her deathbed, Yerim listened intently as Jungeun relayed the whole evening.

It was surprisingly cathartic. Jungeun had been keeping all of her feelings in for so long she had forgotten how good it felt to let them out.

Yerim couldn’t contain her squeal when Jungeun described the kiss, Jungeun even daring to allow a smile to cross her lips.

Yerim also couldn’t contain her gasp at Jinsol’s sudden retreat, and immediately hugged Jungeun when she heard her voice crack and noticed the tears threatening to fall once again.

As Yerim rubbed her back, and soothingly whispered words of support into her ear, Jungeun wondered why she didn’t tell Yerim everything right after it happened.

Yerim pulled away when she was sure Jungeun had calmed down, instead opting to tightly grip her hand.

“What should I do Yerim? Do I wait for her?” Jungeun asked, desperate for some direction.

Yerim just sighed. “You know I can’t tell you what to do. Often, you do the opposite anyways. But this time especially, you’re the only one who can make this decision.”

Jungeun blinked, nodding sadly.

“I’m not even really mad at her. I get it, I really do. I just wish she’d say something, anything. Being in the dark makes it so much harder to believe she’ll eventually come around.”

Jungeun could feel herself getting choked up again, so she took a few calming breaths.

“I know, Jungeun. I wish there was something I could do,” Yerim said. She almost looked more upset than Jungeun did.

Jungeun smiled, a genuine one, for the first time in what felt like forever.

“You’ve done more than just something. Thank you, Yerim. Really, I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Yerim’s eyes widened. Jungeun wasn’t the sappy type, and that was probably the most heartfelt confession she’d ever heard from the older girl.

“Jungeun!”

Yerim jumped on the girl, arms gripped tightly around her neck.

“I love you so much! You are my best friend in the whole wide world! I can’t wait until we are super old and playing checkers at some boujee old folk’s home!” Yerim exclaimed, clearly taking advantage of Jungeun’s moment of softness.

Jungeun rolled her eyes lovingly, but eventually found it slightly hard to breath due to Yerim’s death grip.

“Can’t. Breath.”

Yerim jumped back, but the beaming smile on her face would likely remain for the rest of the afternoon.

“Ok fine, moment over. Besides, girls are only temporary. But you know what lasts forever?”

Jungeun raised an eyebrow. “Friendship?”

“Oh, yeah, that too. But that’s not what I was thinking.” Yerim grinned. “Victory.”

Jungeun snorted. “Victory lasts forever?”

Yerim jumped up. “Of COURSE it does! Don’t tell me you wouldn’t think about scoring the winning goal in the championship, lifting the trophy in front of all of your adoring fans, for the rest of your life.”

“Yerim, this is high school soccer, not the World Cup.”

Right as the warning bell rang and indicated lunch was over, the younger girl rolled her eyes.

“You better fix your attitude before the game! Not very captain-y of you to say shit like that!” Yerim yelled as she walked towards the direction of her next class.

Jungeun fondly shook her head, smile still present.

Last time something didn’t work out in regards to Jinsol, she ended up gaining the best friend she could have ever wished for.

As much as it would suck for a while, she knew she could accept it if Jinsol was the one that got away.

At least she had people like Yerim, and Hyunjin and Chaewon, to catch her when she fell.

Jungeun quickly gathered her things and exited the hallway, feeling her excitement grow with every step.

As she turned a corner, she instantly spotted a familiar head of dark hair further down the hall.

Jinsol was at her locker, fishing for a book underneath the various jackets and discarded food packaging.

Jungeun stopped dead in her tracks, dumbfounded that she was unexpectedly afforded the opportunity to see more than just the back of the girl’s head. She took every second she could to admire the side profile she had missed so dearly.

She stared probably longer than socially acceptable, and whether Jinsol felt the eyes on her, or just happened to look around, their eyes met when Jinsol glanced in her direction.

Even though Jinsol was at the other end of the hallway, Jungeun could see every speck of brown, every eyelash. Every emotion.

Jungeun expected Jinsol to turn away immediately, walking away and pretending it never happened

But she didn’t.

Instead, Jinsol smiled.

It was small. Hesitant. Apologetic, even.

But it was a smile.

And then she walked away.

Maybe Jungeun wouldn’t give up on her just yet.

-

Luckily for Yerim, and the rest of the team, Jungeun’s attitude had done a complete 180 by the time the team stepped onto the field for warmups.

Yerim’s pep talk certainly helped, but Jungeun couldn’t deny that seeing Jinsol’s face again, even for a moment, was enough of a dopamine boost to keep her buzzing the rest of the day.

She was ready to kick some Western ass.

Around 20 minutes from kick off, the crowds began piling into the limited bleacher space. Jungeun commended their commitment, as it was not a warm November afternoon.

Ms. Ha and Ms. Kim had both volunteered to bring multiple pitchers of hot chocolate to give to the shivering home fans. Ms. Kim greeted every student with a bright smile and a shout of “Go Timberwolves!” despite her rosy red cheeks and chattering teeth.

Jungeun caught herself scanning the bleachers every few minutes or so, and wondered when her friends were going to show up.

Eventually, she had to get into “the zone,” as Yerim fondly put it, and her mind became solely focused on the matter at hand. Winning, no matter the cost.

She had worked too hard all season to fail at the last hurdle. And she knew her teammates shared the sentiment. She had to deliver, for them just as much as herself.

Not only that, but the recruiter from her dream college had been delighted when he had heard Jungeun’s team had made it to the championships. He even called her personally and assured her that he’d be present at the game to cheer her on.

So, no pressure.

The referee blew her whistle and called for captains. That was Jungeun’s favourite part. She was usually met with loud cheers from the crowd as she made her way across the field for the coin toss.

As she got closer to the stand, she was finally able to make out her group of friends.

There was Chaewon, wrapped in a huge fuzzy blanket but already on her feet.

There was Hyunjin, seated, but ready to yell obscenities at the refereeing decisions.

There was Heejin, both hands tightly wrapped around Hyunjin’s, looking absolutely lost but equally happy to be there.

And, that was it.

Jungeun sighed.

Shaking off her disappointment, she approached the referee confidently, the expected roar from the fans giving her ego a welcome boost.

The other team’s captain looked nasty. She stared Jungeun dead in the eye and Jungeun swore she heard the girl growl. Jungeun might have been afraid if she wasn’t used to it. Every team in their division knew of her talents, and they often tried to use fear tactics in an attempt to throw her off.

It never worked. When on the field, Jungeun was as cold as ice.

The referee gave them the usual routine: limited subs, play to the whistle, it was a high school game so keep the claws to themselves. As the referee flicked the coin in the air, Jungeun called tails.

It was heads. That was alright, Jungeun liked starting with the ball.

Retreating to her team, her coach brought them all into a huddle. She hadn’t expected him to be so mushy, but they had all bonded over the season, and he assured them that he was proud no matter the result.

Once he left though, the girls all changed their attitude. They knew losing was no option.

After a few last words of encouragement, Jungeun led her soldiers onto the battlefield.

It felt surreal. The field lights were on. The breeze was making her ponytail sway slightly in the wind. The grass, what was left of it, was freshly mowed. The crowd’s chants pumped in her ears.

Jungeun was ready.

-

The game turned out to be a feisty one, as Jungeun half expected after looking at their captain. The rest of her team were clearly on the same page, and tackles were flying in from all over the place, most getting nowhere near the ball.

Jungeun had to hold herself back from punching a few of them square in the face, but boy did she want to.

The game was played at a frantic pace, and Jungeun could barely keep up. Barely being the key word.

Finally losing her two man-markers, Jungeun picked up the ball from midfield, glided past a few of their onrushing defenders, and laid a perfect pass through for Yerim to finish past their helpless keeper.

The crowd went berserk. Yerim immediately jumped into Jungeun’s waiting arms, with their teammates quickly surrounding them.

Jungeun spared a glance to the crowd as they made their way back to their own half. Chaewon, Hyunjin, and Heejin were going absolutely insane. They started leading a chant of Yerim’s name, which the rest of the crowd quickly followed.

However, the chant was fairly short lived, as it didn’t take long for the other team to equalize through a good piece of play from their forwards.

The half came and went, and the score was locked at 1-1.

Both teams had their chances to take the lead. Jungeun took a free kick that bounced off the crossbar. The other team’s captain had a golden opportunity to score but she skied her shot well over, which earned a quiet snicker from Jungeun.

As the game approached the 87th minute, Jungeun won the ball back from the other team’s midfielder. With a quick glance up, she saw a few of her teammates making good runs on the outside, dragging the defenders out of the way and leaving the middle of the field almost completely open.

So Jungeun went for it.

Turning on the gas, she beat their last defender easily and was approaching the penalty box with only the goalkeeper standing in the way. She could barely hear the crowd’s roar of anticipation, and after giving the goalie the eyes, she prepared to take her shot and win the game for her team.

But before she could make contact, she felt a leg slide underneath her, causing her to trip and fall face first onto the ground.

Slightly dazed, she heard the referee’s whistle blow, and as she slowly looked up, she saw her pointed right at the spot.

Penalty.

Dragging herself up and shaking herself off, Jungeun made eyes with the defender who challenged her. It was their captain. What a shock.

Jungeun gave her a wink, and a little wave, as the girl was shown a red card and told to leave the field by the referee.

“Are you okay? That looked like it hurt?” Yerim asked as she approached Jungeun, ball in hand.

“Oh yeah. I’ve had worse falls than that. Kinda pissed I couldn’t take my shot though.”

Yerim smiled. “Well, good thing your on penalties then, cap.”

Jungeun gulped. Oh, right.

She’d taken two penalties throughout the season. One she scored. The other she missed.

After the miss, she made sure to practice penalties at every practice up until the final, so she should have been confident.

She wasn’t.

There was so much pressure on Jungeun’s shoulders in that moment. The game would be won, or potentially lost, with her one kick.

Nodding slowly, Jungeun grabbed the ball from Yerim’s grasp and walked towards the spot.

For the first time all afternoon, the nearby crowd was dead silent. Since they were right beside the net, any noise could throw her off. Jungeun could hear the breeze rustling the nearby trees.

She placed the ball on the penalty spot, and backed up a few paces to ready herself.

Jungeun took one final deep breath, and as she waited for the referee’s whistle, she felt her gaze gravitate towards the stands once more.

Her jaw dropped.

There, sitting right beside Heejin, with a big, ugly sign, was Jinsol.

Jungeun genuinely couldn’t believe it.

She didn’t know when the girl had shown up, but she didn’t care.

Jinsol met her gaze, and smiled so warmly all of the anxiousness in Jungeun’s stomach shrivelled up and disappeared.

“You got this,” Jinsol mouthed, holding her stupid sign in support.

_I didn’t bring any string, so you better not tie!_

That was one of her worst, if Jungeun was being honest. But it made her more happy than all of the other ones combined.

Jungeun just nodded, and a smile of her own crept onto her face at Jinsol’s attempt to mimic Jungeun kicking the ball, scoring, and celebrating wildly from where she was sitting.

What a dork.

The referee retreating from the penalty spot brought Jungeun’s attention back to the matter at hand, and she tried her best to put the thoughts of Jinsol on hold.

Taking another deep breath, she kept her gaze dead on the ball, not even giving the goalie the chance to read her eyes.

The referee blew her whistle, and Jungeun counted to three.

1.

2.

3.

With conviction, Jungeun put all of the pent up feelings since the start of the semester into her kick. All of the good, all of the bad, and all of the in between.

And it worked.

She barely had time to register the ball hitting the back of the net before she was pummeled by her teammates, cheering and already holding back tears.

The crowd was sent into euphoria, with not one fan in their seats, all of them jumping up and down and hugging each other.

“C’mon. Let’s finish this thing,” Jungeun said, as she pushed her teammates off of her.

There was still three minutes left on the clock.

The other team kicked off, and immediately sent the ball into Jungeun’s team’s penalty area. Their goalie, a freshman named Ryujin, gathered the ball quickly and booted the ball as far upfield as she could.

Two minutes.

Yerim retrieved the ball and dribbled it towards the far corner with the intent to keep it there as long as she could.

One minute.

As a last ditch attempt, the other team’s defender pulled Yerim back by the arm, almost throwing her to the ground.

Before Jungeun could go over and give the girl a piece of her mind, the referee blew her whistle for the last time.

They’d done it.

Jungeun was immediately engulfed in hug after hug after hug, she was barely given enough time to process what had happened.

Pitch invaders were running past her at lightning speed, and the cheers were absolutely deafening. Jungeun stood still where she was, soaking the moment in.

She wasn’t afforded long, with the recruiter racing over to be the first to properly greet her.

“Great game as always Jungeun. You play like this next year and I won’t have any choice but to offer you a scholarship to play with us,” the man said with a beaming smile as he shook Jungeun’s hand.

“T-thank you, sir. I would like nothing more,” Jungeun stammered.

“You’re a real talent, Kim. Don’t you forget it.” He nodded one final time before going over to congratulate Jungeun’s coach on the victory.

Jungeun was finally given a chance to take a breath.

Holy shit.

She really just scored the winning goal, to win her team the championship.

Yerim was right, there was no way she’d ever forget that feeling.

As Jungeun looked around to locate the younger girl, she felt someone jump on her back.

“JUNGEUN YOU DID IT! I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU! EVEN THOUGH I WAS READY TO GO AND KICK THAT CHICK’S ASS, YOU GUYS WON ANYWAYS!”

Chaewon was literally screaming in Jungeun’s ear, and Jungeun had no choice but to drop her on her butt, and laughed at the yelp she let out on impact.

“I’m glad you didnt. Imagine how embarrassed she would have been if she was beat up by a 5 foot tall blonde the same day she got a red card in the championship game,” Jungeun smirked, holding her hand out to help the blonde up.

“True. We wouldn’t want her to suffer that much. You are such a gracious victor.”

Yerim finally appeared from behind Chaewon, hair ruffled and smile so wide it looked like it would split her face in half.

“That goal was so sick Yerim! Man, I have such cool friends,” Chaewon smiled, embracing Yerim tighter than Jungeun had ever seen.

Hyunjin and Heejin were next to arrive, sandwiching Jungeun from both sides.

“I’m so proud of you guys! God, if I knew soccer was this exciting I would have started coming ages ago!” Heejin exclaimed.

“Both of you played so well! I was so glad that the ref gave the penalty, I was sure she was just going to wave it off and I’d have to run on the field.” Hyunjin eyed the ref as she was packing up her things.

“Not every ref is blind, Hyunjin.”

“True, but I would say a good 90% of them are.”

Jungeun looked around at her friends and grinned. She was so lucky to have such great people in her life. Not many would want to sit out in the cold just to watch a soccer game.

That was when she realized someone was missing.

Jungeun’s eyes widened.

Where was Jinsol?

She looked around frantically, scanning the field of pitch invaders for a head of jet black hair.

“Where is Jinsol? I swear I saw her sitting on the bleachers with you guys.”

Heejin smiled knowingly and pointed back towards said bleachers.

There she was, sitting patiently on the lower seats. Waiting for Jungeun.

Jungeun’s stomach started doing backflips, but before she could go meet her, she felt a hand grip her arm. She turned to find Haseul beaming at her.

“Congratulations! You and the team played so well, and you brought home another trophy for the cabinet!”

Jungeun half smiled, thoughts still preoccupied by the girl sat alone mere yards from her.

“Oh, thanks! It was a real nail-biter right up until the end there.”

Haseul scoffed. “I’ll say! Anyways, I always throw a party to celebrate a team’s win, so I definitely expect Miss Captain herself to join us!”

Jungeun hesitated. On another night, she might have said yes. But she really had much more pressing matters to deal with.

“Actually, I kind of have something more important I need to do,” Jungeun said, with another glance in Jinsol’s direction.

Jungeun expected Haseul to be upset. However, her smile only seemed to deepen, if anything.

“You know Jungeun, you are like a breath of fresh air.”

Jungeun’s eyebrows furrowed. “How so?”

“You are one of the only people I have ever met who couldn’t give a shit about being popular. I really admire that about you.”

Whatever Jungeun had been expecting, it wasn’t that.

“You do?” Jungeun asked shyly.

“Hell yeah! You are like, one of the coolest people I’ve ever met, and you don’t even have to try. Never change Jungeun, seriously.”

With that, Haseul walked away.

Wow. So much for being worried about popularity.

It took a hard shove on the shoulder from Chaewon to bring Jungeun back to the present.

“Did you hit your head that hard? She’s waiting for you, idiot. Go get her!”

That was all it took.

Jungeun frantically bursted into a sprint towards the bleachers, despite her extremely tired legs, and startled Jinsol by abruptly stopping a few feet in front of her.

They stared at each other for a moment, the loud bustle of the crowd on the field becoming mere white noise.

“Hi.” Jinsol was hesitant, unsure if she even had the right to speak.

Jungeun forced down the smile that threatened to emerge at hearing Jinsol’s voice again. It was like velvet.

God had she missed her.

“Hey.”

Silence.

They were both waiting for Jinsol to say something, but neither knew what that would be.

Then, Jinsol finally stood up and took a step closer, and was visibly relieved when Jungeun didn’t retreat.

“I’m sorry I was late.”

At that, Jungeun couldn’t help but smile. It had been a while since she’d last heard that.

“It’s alright. You weren’t that late.”

Jinsol furrowed her brow at the statement, but eventually the wheels started to turn, and a chuckle escaped her lips.

Jungeun followed suit, and the atmosphere that was threatening to get awkward felt much more familiar.

“I wasn’t sure if you wanted to talk to me so I kind of stayed back here and was hoping you’d find me, which you did thankfully because that would have been really awkward if you’d left without noticing me sitt-”

Jungeun always found it adorable when Jinsol rambled, but she didn’t have the patience to deal with it in that moment. So, she did the one thing she had missed the most over their two weeks of separation.

She walked up to Jinsol and wrapped her arms around her neck.

Jungeun felt almost all of the tension in Jinsol’s body melt away, and she nuzzled her face into the dark haired girl’s neck when she felt a pair of arms snake around her waist.

Jungeun swore there was no better feeling than the comfort and warmth being in Jinsol’s arms brought.

“I’m so sorry,” Jinsol whispered against the side of Jungeun’s head.

Jungeun just shook her head in response. She had forgiven Jinsol the minute their eyes had met in the hallway.

“Don’t worry about it.”

Jinsol sighed.

“I have been worried about it. I’m ready to talk now, if you’d be willing to hear me out.”

Jungeun pulled back slightly, enough to take in Jinsol’s face. She smiled when she instantly recognized The Look. She’d missed that too.

“I might know a place.”

-

Jungeun hadn’t expected to ever find herself back at the park where everything went wrong. As the two weeks went on, the persistent worry that Jinsol would never want anything to do with her ever again kept growing, becoming more of a reality.

Lucky for her, that might not have been the case, as she was sitting back on the very same slide, with the same girl right beside her.

Neither had said much on the ride over, and it had been largely silent ever since they sat down.

The community wasn’t quite as deserted as it was previously. There were a few dog owners at the park, their dogs involved in quite a competitive game of catch.

Jungeun was thankful. The silence between them was constantly threatening to become deafening, so the occasional bark was welcomed.

Again, they were both waiting for Jinsol to say something.

This time, however, she didn’t seem nearly as confused or hesitant as she often was. If anything, she was bursting at the seams.

“Okay. So, where do you want me to start?” Jinsol asked.

“How about from the beginning?”

Jinsol took in a deep breath.

“The beginning. Sure.” Jinsol paused. “Just to warn you, this might come out really messy and scrambled. As you have probably noticed, I’m not that great with words.”

Jungeun smiled, and squeezed Jinsol’s hand a little tighter.

“We’ve got all night.”

That finally seemed to relax Jinsol, and she took in yet another deep breath.

“Ok. So I guess I should start with the fact that I’m gay.”

Jungeun nodded, having already come to that conclusion herself.

Jinsol stared blankly at Jungeun, clearly expecting more of a reaction.

“What, you are just going to nod?”

“Well, yeah. I kind of figured that out already.”

Jinsol gasped. “Really? How? Was it that obvious?”

Jungeun snorted. “I mean, you kind of short circuited both when I came out to you and when you saw Ms. Ha and Ms. Kim be gross. Plus, you flirted with me, like, all the time, which wasn’t super suspicious until I realized you only did it with me.

“Then there was you clearly being jealous of Mingyu at the bowling alley, which was funny but also kinda hot.”

Jinsol kept shaking her head throughout Jungeun’s whole explanation.

“I had no idea I was that much of an open book.”

Jungeun smiled. She was still pretty proud of how well she was able to read the older girl.

“Well there was also the fact that you kissed me. If I didn’t know before then, I definitely would have after that.”

Jinsol blushed at the reminder.

“Yeah I guess that would have been a pretty big giveaway,” Jinsol chuckled shyly.

Jungeun nudged her, encouraging her to keep going.

“Anyways, obviously meeting you was kind of the catalyst for the whole, me figuring out my sexuality thing. I’ve never really had the time for relationships or anything like that before, what with work and school taking up all of my time.”

Jungeun nodded understandingly.

“But like I said, you really threw my head through a loop. All of a sudden, you were all that I thought about. After our first tutoring session, I spent the entire week trying to come up with some reason to text you,” Jinsol admitted.

“And then you came out to me. You were the first person besides Heejin to ever come out to me, and she’s been my best friend since preschool so I never thought of her the way I thought of you after that.”

Jungeun was enthralled in Jinsol’s story. It was refreshing to finally know what had been on the other girl’s mind beyond pure speculation.

“After that, and our little ice cream not-date, I started to think about you more and more, even though I had no idea why. It made things really confusing, but I still wanted to spend as much time as possible with you.

“And then you told me how you came to terms with your sexuality. At the time, I told myself I asked you about it because I was just curious, but that clearly wasn’t true. Your answer wasn’t super helpful either, even though I’m happy it was pretty easy for you.”

Jungeun sighed. “I wish I could have been more help to you.”

Jinsol just smiled. “Meeting you, being around you, even being your friend made me more happy than I ever had been. You did enough just being a part of my life, trust me.”

Jungeun felt her heart expand about three times its original size. She had felt so guilty about not being there for Jinsol enough. Maybe she had been, just not in the way she’d imagined.

Jinsol was quiet for a while after that. There was still a ways left to go, so Jungeun figured the next part required a little courage to admit.

“It was honestly really hard. I couldn’t understand why I felt different when I hung out with you compared to when I hung out with Heejin. You’re both gay and were both my friend, but I just thought about you in a different way, and that didn’t make sense for the longest time.”

Jungeun’s eyes widened. “So when did you finally figure it out?”

“At the bowling alley. Seeing Mingyu’s sad attempts at flirting, but flirting nonetheless, made me so jealous in a way I never had been before. I had to say to myself, ‘Why are you getting so worked up over this?’”

“Because you like me.”

Jinsol smirked. “Yeah. Because I like you. And that just kind of put everything into context for me, like a switch had been flipped. I hadn’t considered the possibility that I could be gay until that moment, but it also felt like I had known the whole time. It all started to make sense, but that didn’t make it any less terrifying.”

They were silent for a few moments, both ruminating over what had been shared.

There was still something Jungeun wanted addressed, as scared as she was to bring it up.

“Why did you run away?”

Any trace of a smile on Jinsol’s face was immediately washed away, and she grabbed both of Jungeun’s hands to hold in her own. Her face was the most serious Jungeun had ever seen it.

“Jungeun, the last thing I wanted to do was leave you here, believe me. It’s just, I was so overwhelmed. I thought kissing you would make things easier for me, but instead it made them even more complicated,” Jinsol said, eyes full of sorrow and guilt.

“I needed to figure out what I wanted and who I was, and I didn’t think it was fair to you to drag you down that hole with me if it turned out I wanted something else.”

Jinsol sighed, and focused her gaze on the intense game of catch occurring over Jungeun’s shoulder. A few kids had decided to join the dogs, and despite their vast disadvantage, it was an intriguing matchup.

“I actually ended up talking to my mom about it. I was worried about how she’d react, but she listened to everything and was really supportive, which was a nice surprise. Talking to her about it definitely made things a lot clearer for me, and now I know what I want and who I am.”

Jungeun closed her eyes and looked down at the ground in front of them.

“So, what do you want?” Jungeun asked, still unsure if she wanted to hear the answer.

She felt Jinsol’s fingers gently find their way underneath her chin, and they lifted her head up so she could meet Jinsol’s gaze.

Jungeun recognized everything Jinsol was trying to convey. Admiration. Assurance. Affection. A touch of guilt.

But there was something else, something much bigger and more important than the rest, that made Jungeun’s heart flutter.

“You, Jungeun. Always.”

The smile that found its way onto Jungeun’s face was one of pure elation. She breathed out a sigh of relief, before moving a hand behind Jinsol’s neck to bring her in closer.

Jungeun closed her eyes right before connecting their lips in a kiss much different from their first one. It wasn’t rushed, it wasn’t sloppy, and it was much sweeter.

They were both smiling, and they had to pull away a few times to giggle, but the breaks never lasted long. Jungeun wasn’t even sure she was living in reality.

Jungeun didn’t think anything could beat their first kiss, but being with Jinsol in that moment, with no trace of uncertainty or doubt, was the best feeling she’d ever experienced.

Jinsol was the one to fully pull away, and Jungeun might have felt a bit of deja vu if Jinsol hadn’t stayed close enough to rest their foreheads together.

“I really am sorry, Jungeun, for everything. I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, or trust me right away. But I want to win that back, whatever it takes.”

Jungeun smiled sweetly, sure she looked like an idiot in love.

But she was.

“I know you will.”

-

Jungeun was at her locker, fishing for her chemistry textbook that had somehow gotten lost under Yerim’s multitude of hoodies. No matter how many times Jungeun scolded her, the younger girl always forgot to bring her stuff home with her, and it led to their shared locker having more clothes than Jungeun’s closet.

She was so focused on the task at hand that she didn’t hear someone approach from behind her. When the person poked her side, Jungeun almost screamed, and turned around violently, prepared to smack whoever it was.

At the sight of her girlfriend, cheeky grin and all, she did just that.

A few curious onlookers watched the display with amusement as Jungeun hit Jinsol’s arm over and over again.

Jungeun found that there were often numerous pairs of eyes on the two of them as they walked down the hallway or sat together at lunch.

But Jungeun also found that she didn’t care in the slightest.

“You’re such an asshole,” Jungeun pouted.

Jinsol laughed, poking Jungeun’s outstretched bottom lip.

“Sorry gorgeous, but did you really expect me to turn that one down?”

They’d been together for about a month. Or maybe it was two, Jungeun found it hard to keep track. To her, it felt like she’d known Jinsol her entire life.

Despite how long it was, Jungeun still blushed every time Jinsol showed her any sort of affection, either through cringy, but adorable, pet names, or one of Jinsol’s classic “surprise kisses” meant to catch Jungeun off guard.

Jinsol loved doing that. Any chance she had to make the usually collected girl squirm, she’d take.

It slightly surprised Jungeun that Jinsol was so forward, considering how new to her sexuality she still was.

But, knowing Jinsol, it also didn’t surprise her in the slightest.

Jungeun rolled her eyes, blush very present much to Jinsol’s glee, and faced her locker to resume her search. She finally found the book she’d been looking for that somehow made its way into a pair of Yerim’s sweatpants.

Closing her locker, Jungeun turned back around towards Jinsol and immediately recognized the look on the dark haired girl’s face. Jungeun narrowed her eyes.

“What is it? You’re hiding something.”

Jinsol gasped in mock offence. “Me? I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Jungeun stood still, glaring at Jinsol until she broke.

At the smile that slowly spread across Jinsol’s face, Jungeun was glad it was something good.

“Well, you know the assistant manager job I interviewed for last week?”

“Yeah?” Jungeun asked hesitantly.

“I didn’t get it,” Jinsol said, but she surprisingly didn’t seem that upset.

“Oh baby, I’m sorry. I thought for sure you would!” Jungeun reached to grab Jinsol’s hand in support, but Jinsol tugged her hand away before she could.

“But! The other location in town was also looking for an assistant manager, so my manager passed my resume along and they hired me!” Jinsol was ecstatic, grin out in full force.

Jungeun loved that grin, so much so that she wrapped her arms around Jinsol’s waist and spun her around a few times in congratulations.

“That’s so great! I’m so happy for you Jinsol, you’ve earned it,” Jungeun applauded as she finally put Jinsol back on solid ground.

Jinsol blushed at the compliment and quickly kissed Jungeun’s cheek before the younger girl could stop her.

“But that isn't even the best part! This branch pays more and it’s closer to you! So now I can work better hours, get better tips, AND see you more.”

Jungeun’s heart soared.

If there was one complaint she had in their relationship over the past few months, it was that their schedules often didn’t line up as much as she would have liked.

Jinsol’s job, well, previous job, was on the other side of town from Jungeun, and she almost always finished too late to see Jungeun afterwards.

It limited much of their time together to either at school or on weekends, when they weren’t busy with other things. But all of that wouldn’t be a problem if Jinsol was closer to her and was able to work less late shifts.

Jungeun couldn’t believe their luck.

Looking up at her girlfriend, Jungeun laughed at the recognizable look Jinsol was wearing. Those days, basically every time Jungeun and Jinsol were together, Jinsol had The Look on her face, to the point where even their friends had started to notice it.

Jinsol’s smile immediately vanished, with panic replacing it.

“What? Do I have something on my face? I told you I shouldn’t have brought spaghetti for lunch.”

Before Jinsol could dart to the bathroom, Jungeun gently grabbed her wrist before interlocking their fingers.

“No, it isn’t that. It’s just, have you ever noticed you always look at me, like, in a certain way?”

Jinsol blinked. “No? How could I see my own face, Jungeun.”

Jungeun rolled her eyes. “Ok fine. Have you ever felt yourself looking at me differently than other people?”

Jinsol paused, seemingly deep in thought.

“Well, yeah I guess. You are my girlfriend, I’m not going to look at you the same way I look at Ms. Kim.”

Jungeun groaned. There was no way Jinsol hadn’t noticed it.

“No! It started before we were dating. I think it was when I first tutored you, maybe when you asked for my number? I can’t remember,” Jungeun mumbled. As if she’d ever forget it.

Jinsol smirked, amused at Jungeun trying to downplay a moment she clearly remembered scene for scene.

“Alright. Let’s say I did have some “special look” reserved just for you. Describe it to me.”

Jungeun leaned back against her locker, staring into Jinsol’s deep, brown eyes, and started to describe the look that had been framed in Jungeun’s mind for months.

“Well, it’s mainly in your eyes. You know they are my favourite part about you, and it’s because they always have so much to say. And when you look at me, they say a lot of things,” Jungeun responded shyly.

She was slightly worried she had read far too much into a simple look, but Jinsol’s slight step closer and her thumb rubbing reassuring patterns on Jungeun’s hand sent those worries away. She was good at that.

“At the beginning, there was some uncertainty. There was also curiosity, but that went away fairly quickly. Later on, there was definitely more fear. Fear of your feelings, I guess, and what they meant.”

Jinsol nodded along, which meant Jungeun was on the right track.

“But there were a few things that have been there basically since the beginning. Care. Respect. Comfort. Admiration. Protectiveness. Maybe excitement?” Jungeun trailed off. She had left one out, and it was a big one.

“So basically everything that I feel for you when I look at you?”

Jungeun nodded. It was tugging on the tip of her tongue.

“And what else?”

Jungeun braced herself.

“And love.”

She paused and waited for Jinsol to inevitably panic, maybe even run away.

It seemed like it should have been a bit early for that, right? To Jungeun, she was pretty sure she’d felt that way for a while, but she did have a bit of a head start on the older girl.

After a few silent moments, Jinsol was still there.

And the soft smile, also largely reserved for Jungeun, that had appeared sometime during Jungeun’s illustration had only grown in size.

“Yeah, I think that about sums it up.”

Maybe they didn’t need to say it outright, but they knew.

Jungeun beamed, grabbing the collar of Jinsol’s shirt and connecting their lips.

No matter how many times they kissed, each one somehow felt better than the last. But Jungeun was pretty sure that one would take a while to forget.

Their moment was unfortunately interrupted by someone loudly clearing their throat on Jungeun’s right.

The girls jumped apart, Jungeun immediately embarrassed at the PDA. She usually kept Jinsol on a tight leash in that regard, but hey. She was only human.

They both turned and were greeted by Ms. Ha, who was grinning excitedly as her eyes bounced between the two of them.

Jungeun coughed. “Um, hi Ms. Ha! What’s up?”

“So it’s true! You guys are together! Ugh, finally,” Ms. Ha said with exasperation.

Jinsol and Jungeun looked at each other, sharing the same confused expression.

“What do you mean, finally?” Jinsol asked.

“Well it didn’t seem like Jungeun was EVER going to stop pining after you! You have no idea how painful it was to watch her during freshman year. She looked like a sad puppy, staring at the back of your head the whole class.”

Jungeun’s face must have resembled a firetruck, and she fiddled with the zipper on her jacket to distract herself from the fact she’d basically been exposed by her teacher.

“And when I saw you were both in my class again this year I prayed that Jungeun would have done SOMETHING during your sophomore year, but no! It was the same old shit.” Ms. Ha’s eyes widened at the accidental curse. “Oops, sorry. Don’t tell anyone I said that.”

Jinsol laughed, quite clearly amused at the whole situation, whereas Jungeun wanted to curl up into a ball and die.

“So I felt it was my duty, my obligation, my right, as not only your teacher but as a,” she stepped a little closer to whisper “fellow gay,” and stepped back, “to at least give you guys a helping hand.”

Jungeun finally glanced upwards, suddenly interested in the trajectory of conversation.

“What did you do?” Jungeun asked, eyes narrowing at her favourite teacher.

“Do you really think it was some god-given coincidence that you ended up being Jinsol’s tutor?”

Jinsol gasped. “You set us up?”

Ms. Ha winked. “Bingo. I expect an invite to the wedding!” she sang as she skipped away in the direction of Ms. Kim’s classroom. The redhead must have been rubbing off on her.

Jungeun blew out a much needed breath, and once she met Jinsol’s eyes, they both burst into laughter.

“I can’t believe we got together because Ms. Ha couldn’t take anymore of your gay pining,” Jinsol teased, already bracing the arm Jungeun was preparing to slap.

“I would have made a move eventually…” Jungeun trailed off. Maybe she wouldn’t have.

Would they have even gotten to know each other if it weren’t for Ms. Ha’s meddling?

Sensing her girlfriend start to spiral, Jinsol started walking and tugged their extended hands towards the cafeteria. Their friends were probably wondering what was taking so long.

“Stop thinking so hard, I can see your brain working from here.”

As she followed slightly behind her girlfriend, watching her straight black hair fall effortlessly down her back, Jungeun couldn’t believe how far they’d come.

She remembered when Jinsol was only a mystery. She remembered every moment in which Jinsol revealed something else, something new, something that only Jungeun had the pleasure of seeing.

And in that moment, the older girl turning to meet Jungeun’s gaze and expecting the usual witty comeback, Jungeun was so happy Jinsol had given her the opportunity to love her.

“Maybe you should give it a try! Then you probably wouldn’t have failed freshman chemistry.”

“I didn’t fail! I got a C-!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the end!
> 
> idk if i'm 100% about the ending but! i hope you enjoyed reading this bc i loved writing it :)
> 
> like i said, this was my first fic so pleeeease leave a comment letting me know your thoughts
> 
> i think i'd like to write more in the future, schedule permitting, but we'll see
> 
> thank you for reading :)))
> 
> (p.s. my twitter is @lo_ells so come say hi)


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